When his disciple Tzu-Kung asked, "What is a true gentleman?"
"He acts before he speaks,
and afterwards speaks
according to his actions." - Confucious
Did you hear about the storm-wed?
a "man to leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife, and the two shall become one,"
Would she suspect I had stepped out of walking next to her on our lengthy wedding procession to quietly invite a total stranger to participate as a secret scribe to the event with a request to post it to the internet with the title white-out wedding?
"... toward each other obligations of mutual respect, fidelity, and support." - California family code 720.; "... a duty of the highest good faith and fair dealing... and neither shall take any unfair advantage of the other. ... the spouse... holding as a trustee... the other spouse..." - California family code 721(a-b3)
she fancied: "A breach by anticipatory repudiation (or simply anticipatory breach) is an unequivocal indication" - Wikipedia on Breach of Contract
Jumpin' from:"Mostly I just wanted to say thank you for the way that you loved me, for how completely you saw me and loved me. I ... wish that at that time I had more tools... I am sorry for how my areas of imperfection must have felt to you ... But really, simply, thank you for loving me like I was the one ... I have never before, nor ever since then had that particular kind of love, that completeness in love."- message from Marsi on Sep 23, 2009
... I wanted to let you know that someone asked me today what the most momentous event of this past decade was to me, and unquestionably the answer was our wedding. Thank you for the amazing experience and memory. I will never forget it.
Happy New Year.
Marsi"- message from Marsi on December 30, 2009
to:"4:01pm "we did not agree to a 10 year separation... We were not wed... we WERE going to be married... I had to cancel our wedding... That is that. We NEVER..."- message from Marsi on March 3, 2012
June 18, 2012 Robert 8:18pm "... therapist ... suggested the ten year separation... "
June 18, 2012 Marsi 8:50pm "... she did not recommend a 10 year separation...no therapist would recommend that. I don't know what part of your imagination concocted that up... that therapist certainly did not recommend a 10 year separation, nor would I have agreed to one ..."
June 20, 2012 Robert 3:33pm "... i was there, it did happen ... "
June 21, 2012 Marsi 9:51am "It didn't happen you've made that up.""Whereas Aristotle had claimed that virtue was to be found in the golden mean between excess and deficiency of emotion (metriopatheia), the Stoics sought freedom from all passions (apatheia). It meant eradicating the tendency to react emotionally or egotistically to ... the things we cannot control. ... for we cannot control things that are caused by the will of others ... The Stoic who performs correct (virtuous) judgments and actions as part of the world-order experiences contentment (eudaimonia) and good feelings (eupatheia)." - Wikipedia on Apatheialink
She'd asked how she might work on our differences during the separation, and I happen to have been looking through masters degrees for psychology. Once I pictured her with the masters degree and had word of lightning in a bottle perhaps going public, the rest seemed a natural fit. Only to-do was the ten year separation agreement. I'd agreed to bring her the annointing from the Nazir as well as a mind-technique resistant to cognitive subsuming followed by an interregnum stay in Oklahoma; an agreement later amended at the request of a judge to include two years work history.
But that she didn't reek of post-vow contribution, as the recommended masters in spiritual psychology or the introduction to lightning in a bottle, that was intended as a conferment among partners then I'd have trouble explaining why she would have been soo grateful.
But that's been my lemma... A ten year bargain after nuptuals, with an at-some-point shared interest in due dilligence. Seems an August 30, 2002 for a wedding that she breached on March 3rd, 2012, before an end to the separation. But to keep it from even potentially sparking up and catching a Bigamy case for moving on, I'm gonna cover that with paper that's just gonna sit there and be true.