Global Bacon Shortage!?!

All things outside of Burning Man.

Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby piehole » Mon Sep 24, 2012 6:15 pm

"In a recent press release, the U.K.'s National Pig Association is warning that a "world shortage of pork and bacon next year is now unavoidable" "

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/09/24/bacon-sausage-shortage_n_1909609.html?ncid=edlinkusaolp00000003


:shock:
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby Sham » Mon Sep 24, 2012 6:19 pm

None of this matters to me, because I'm going out tomorrow and stocking up on enough bacon to fill my freezer.
A day without bacon, is like a day without sunshine.
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby piehole » Mon Sep 24, 2012 6:27 pm

WHY DOES BACON HAVE TO BE SO DELICIOUS

THIS IS ALL OUR FAULT
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby SaritaSyrah » Mon Sep 24, 2012 6:36 pm

:shock:

no...NO!
BURN SHIT!
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby piehole » Mon Sep 24, 2012 6:48 pm

What are we gonna do, Sarah??
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby SaritaSyrah » Mon Sep 24, 2012 7:27 pm

I just...have no words. Hold me?
BURN SHIT!
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby mgb327 » Mon Sep 24, 2012 7:32 pm

I am already stashing BACON! for next year...have about 8 pounds vacu-sealed and in the freezer. I go to a "food auction" about every 6 weeks, and sometimes can score a 15 pound box "meant for" some certain "un-named" high class restaurant in NYC. It's a Tony Soprano thing, end of story.
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby Sham » Mon Sep 24, 2012 7:33 pm

SaritaSyrah wrote:I just...have no words. Hold me?

Shit, that was easy!
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby mgb327 » Mon Sep 24, 2012 7:41 pm

WHOOOSH!!!! What was that noize? Letting SaritaSyrahs' comment go right over my head. Dangit.
Dogs are the leaders of the planet. If you see two life forms, one of them’s making a poop, the other one’s carrying it for him, who would you assume is in charge?
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby SaritaSyrah » Mon Sep 24, 2012 7:44 pm

Shambala wrote:
SaritaSyrah wrote:I just...have no words. Hold me?

Shit, that was easy!



The world is ending. No time for dinner and a movie first.

Bacon. Shortage.
BURN SHIT!
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby SaritaSyrah » Mon Sep 24, 2012 7:47 pm

People were killing each other in 2008 because of a rice shortage. This is BACON.
BURN SHIT!
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby Lonesomebri » Mon Sep 24, 2012 7:53 pm

No one is going to run out of bacon !!
There's no need to go out and hoard any !
There will always be plenty.......

Just gonna run out for a minute, maybe head down to the butcher and see what's he doing tonight.... Be right back. Relax. Wait here for me.
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby BBadger » Mon Sep 24, 2012 8:00 pm

Sorry guys! I didn't mean to cause the shortage, but the bacon was really tasty and I couldn't help myself!
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby piehole » Mon Sep 24, 2012 8:28 pm

Now I don't know how to feel about this bacon shortage at all!
At first I was bummed
but now,
I kinda like it :twisted:
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby FIGJAM » Mon Sep 24, 2012 9:04 pm

Don't hoard the bacon!!!

There will be plenty for everyone.

If you do there will have to be a lottery.

Then the bacon scalpers will get involved.

Everyone will be eating lettuce an tomato samich's!!!!!!!! :shock:
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby Ugly Dougly » Tue Sep 25, 2012 9:50 am

Calm down, now, citizens. Our government has wisely devised a plan.


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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby moonrise » Tue Sep 25, 2012 9:56 am

Soon, it'll all be Soylent Bacon... :cry: The end is near and soy is toxic!

I see no hope for us unless we raise the swine ourselves.

BFB or Burners for Bacon, it's our only hope!
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby Sham » Tue Sep 25, 2012 10:56 am

FIGJAM wrote:Don't hoard the bacon!!!

There will be plenty for everyone.

If you do there will have to be a lottery.

Then the bacon scalpers will get involved.

Everyone will be eating lettuce an tomato samich's!!!!!!!! :shock:

....then there will be a glut of bacon, and prices will plummet! :roll:
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby Savannah » Tue Sep 25, 2012 10:58 am

SaritaSyrah wrote:
Shambala wrote:
SaritaSyrah wrote:I just...have no words. Hold me?

Shit, that was easy!



The world is ending. No time for dinner and a movie first.


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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby SquirrelHead » Tue Sep 25, 2012 1:35 pm

This is a great reason to go buy a freezer chest and pack it full of tasty pig! I wonder if bacon will trade like gold soon.

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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby Box Burner » Tue Sep 25, 2012 4:33 pm

Alert!

Just in --- The Spamalope to be been put on the endangered species list.

The world wide shortage of bacon prompted several wildlife conservation organizations, including the Natural Resources Defense Council, the Wildlife Conservation Society and The Sierra Club to petitioned the President of the United States, Barack Obama and the U.N. to have the Spamalope put on the Endangered Species list. Lisa Renstrom, the President of the Sierra Club, noted that "The world wide shortage of bacon is a good indicator that there is also a worldwide shortage of pigs and bacon comes from pigs." Saying that "since pork is mainly what spamalopes forage for, it is imperative that we get the Spamalope on the endangered species list as soon as possible."

When contacted, Chief Tom Tidwell, head of the US Forest Service, Said that with hunting season about to open the Forest service has the issue of the Spamalope "under revue" and that there were no plans to ban or limit hunting of Spamalopes at this time. Various State forest service Officials were in atendence and all seemed to concur with Cheif Tidwell.

One State Oficial from Georgia, Speaking on condition of anonymity Said that "Spamalope hunting tags for this season have all been sold and there is no way that they can be recalled. We would have hoards of angry hunters and nosiree bob, I do not want to have my name on such a recall."

When asked if the reference to pigs as "what Spamalopes forage for" meant that Spamalopes may in fact be carnivorous, Cheif Tidwell declined to comment. Spamalopes although skittish and reclusive, are believed to be gentle creatures. Scientific studies of the Spamalope made by the government have never been released to the public.
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby Ugly Dougly » Tue Sep 25, 2012 5:02 pm

Does it look like real bacon?
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby Ugly Dougly » Tue Sep 25, 2012 5:05 pm

The future is here.

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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby Trishntek » Tue Sep 25, 2012 5:18 pm

It's elementary. With Burning Man over a mere three weeks, the globe is still recovering from the seasonal demand surge for pork bellies due to the elevated population of the event.
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Bacon Shortage UPDATE

Postby piehole » Tue Sep 25, 2012 7:28 pm

http://lifeinc.today.com/_news/2012/09/25/14095135-bacon-shortage-worldwide-unavoidable-uk-pig-group-says?chromedomain=bottomline

Turns out we're not going to be affected as much as the Huffington Post article had sensationalized in their article.
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby Isotopia » Tue Sep 25, 2012 8:13 pm

Expect counterfeit bacon and bacon products in the coming weeks.

If bacon ceases to exist then let the Mayans be right.
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby ygmir » Tue Sep 25, 2012 8:19 pm

Isotopia wrote:Expect counterfeit bacon and bacon products in the coming weeks.

If bacon ceases to exist then let the Mayans be right.


would you call "long pork" bacon "conterfiet"?

I say, "go for Soylent bacon".........over.
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby Kinetik V » Tue Sep 25, 2012 8:54 pm

The US has a strategic petroleum reserve, we have a strategic grain reserve. And there's even one for maple syrup!

We should have a strategic bacon reserve. Yes, it's that damn important.
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby theCryptofishist » Tue Sep 25, 2012 9:08 pm

All of you. Just put pens under your houses and grow your own pigs. Be careful feeding them garbage, because some diseases are spread that way, but basically they are a wonder animal that eats scraps and produces meat.
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Re: Global Bacon Shortage!?!

Postby Lonesomebri » Tue Sep 25, 2012 9:15 pm

Delicious naturally lean free range organic fair trade kosher non-gluten non-GMO non-testerone socially consciouc water processed hand carved
Hippie Bacon.
65% less fat than that other soft white smarter mud bather. Delicious hippie bacon. The choice for the new epoch.
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