Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptance

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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby stinkyfoot » Fri Jul 27, 2012 11:08 am

wh..sh wrote:I am not questioning any intents or Feet's happiness. People should do what makes them happy.
I just refuse to agree with the general notion that naked people are more secure and vice versa. There are all kinds in both nudist and non-nudist groups.
Clothes (or lack of it) don't make a man.

I just had to state my unpopular views when Feet presented comfort with nudity as a counter-statement to insecurity.


I prefer nudity because it feels nice. I love the feel of fresh air or water over my bits. But I'd be lying if I said it doesn't take a certain amount of mental preparedness to get nude in front of a bunch of people that I'm not in an intimate relationship with.

But security is not the right word, exactly, for what it is that you need to get naked in front of others. If that were true then strippers and porn-stars would all be paragons of self esteem and body-positivity, but I think it's fairly obvious that there's as much of a range in body security among adult entertainers as there is in the general population.

The thing that I think about when considering public nudity is that we live in a society where women's bodies are considered public property, and this notion is reinforced through media, interactions with other people, the viewpoints of our friends and acquaintances, the things our mother's teach us about what's appropriate to wear in public and what's not, among other things.

But I feel that my body is irrevocably my property and no one else's, and daily, I feel that conflict between what I believe and know to be true and what's nastily floating around there about women's bodies out in the default world. So, to even decide to be nude in a safe space like Burning Man is still fraught with this conflict. It's kind of like what some notable gay figures have written about PDA's in public, about how the simple act of caressing your loved one becomes some huge mental effort because you're always aware that there are people out there who're violently opposed to your very existence and who even feel entitled to that feeling and don't see anything wrong with the way they think. And you also know that, to those unfortunately numerous people, a simple PDA is like saying, 'hey, come over here and harass me.'

It's the same thing, even though I simply enjoy nudity and am actually topless as I write this post in the privacy of my own home, know that there is a sizable chuck of the population out there who is violently opposed to the thought that my body is no one else's by my own, and that my decision to be nude would be taken as less to do with the fact that I just enjoy being nude, and become an open invitation to harassment and potential violence against my person.

It's not a light decision.

I mean fuck, I almost had to break some dude's finger off because he attempted to reach under my short skirt when I was out at a club last Friday. It's probably good for both of us that he ran away after I reached back there and grabbed his hand when I felt him fumbling.
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby theCryptofishist » Fri Jul 27, 2012 11:22 am

For what it's worth, the early intent of clothing and adornment was to enhance and emphacize, rather than to hide. (Although, I'm pretty damn sure that there were rules around all that, as to who and in what situations.) And if you've ever spent much time with small children, you'll find that they will strip off at just about any provokation.
Yeah, I have a burn uniform--tee shirts and shorts. I've got uniforms (note: get these started...) for Apok, of course, but I just can't be bothered to do too much with more. Interesting to think about, but I bet our attitudes to our clothes are complicated and varied.
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby wh..sh » Fri Jul 27, 2012 1:42 pm

General rant -

Does nudity directly translate to a secure person?
In a group of, say, 50 naked women, if I chose to be clothed, does that make me a secure person?

There are lot of reasons why people chose to go naked - some genuinely don't care, some care a little, some rebel, some crave attention, some are curious.
I know this girl who likes to get naked. During a lazy afternoon walk, I asked her why she likes it. She said "I guess I like the attention I get".
Oh so shallow, right? - I was actually impressed with her. Sure, she might not be this perfect sample of "secure" womanhood, but she knew exactly what she wanted out of her action.
She was not trying to prove to the world or to herself that she had any other intention. I sort of realized that this girl will be "cool" and "kick ass" even if she doesn't take off her clothes.

Sometimes its a generational thing. Older women have different reasons to get naked and younger women have different reasons.
For instance, the reason why this girl might go naked might change drastically as she ages. Maybe there will be a day when she won't care and will go naked just because...
Then there is struggle with restrictive society. It is an emotional struggle to break the barrier of self-judgement (as AntiM said) and get naked infront of others.
It's a big deal and people do feel a sense of achievement. Very telling! Still there is a piece that at some level these people feel repressed by society and want to be free (rightfully so).

To me, security is about knowing oneself. It's about understanding and accepting oneself (even if one has limitations). This has nothing to do with clothes.
Then again, this is an ongoing process. We will all have moments of security and moments of insecurity which will allows us to question ourselves, question whats around us, find answers, and allow us to grow.
Last edited by wh..sh on Fri Jul 27, 2012 2:03 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby theCryptofishist » Fri Jul 27, 2012 1:49 pm

wh..sh,
For what it's worth, you have no need to argue this with me. I prefer to be able to run around naked, when given the chance, but I don't. Especially not at the burn. It's 4,000' and a lot of uv. I have skin grafts--both doner and recipient sites. That stuff isn't supposed to get burned/tanned. Fragile. (It's weird the sort of texture it has, even untanned.) I remember in 08 some drunken idiot trying to convince me that it was okay for me to go naked and I kept saying no, and he kept on with the "you're beautiful as you are" which was so not the point. (Of course, I could have explained to him. But some days I don't want to have to educate the people around me.)
My post was just about how people are, not how they should be. If that makes any sense. Sorry if it felt judging or like telling you what to do.

Okay, just plain old, sorry. Do what you like. Do what feels right to you. It is so not an important thing when you are on playa, really.
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby wh..sh » Fri Jul 27, 2012 1:59 pm

theCryptofishist wrote:wh..sh,
For what it's worth, you have no need to argue this with me. I prefer to be able to run around naked, when given the chance, but I don't. Especially not at the burn. It's 4,000' and a lot of uv. I have skin grafts--both doner and recipient sites. That stuff isn't supposed to get burned/tanned. Fragile. (It's weird the sort of texture it has, even untanned.) I remember in 08 some drunken idiot trying to convince me that it was okay for me to go naked and I kept saying no, and he kept on with the "you're beautiful as you are" which was so not the point. (Of course, I could have explained to him. But some days I don't want to have to educate the people around me.)
My post was just about how people are, not how they should be. If that makes any sense. Sorry if it felt judging or like telling you what to do.

Okay, just plain old, sorry. Do what you like. Do what feels right to you. It is so not an important thing when you are on playa, really.

No! Fishy, not at all. Eeekks, my post was just a general rant.

There is nothing in your post that I wouldnt agree. I am not much of a preacher myself.
I actually wasn't arguing with you (or with anyone for that matter). I just read few replies about it and I thought I should expand on what I was trying to say. Slow Friday afternoon... :mrgreen:
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby pink » Sun Jul 29, 2012 11:57 pm

I just about live topless at the burn. A lot of it IS that in the US at least, it's generally not permitted. At the burn it's one of my ways of throwing off defaultia.

My first burn I had lost a lot of weight from stress in dealing with my mum's death and going through divorce. I've been gaining weight ever since, but except for photos (where I always think I look huge), I feel fine. What doesn't feel fine is being out of shape. So today I finally got off my butt and started moving again. Need to be in better shape for the playa. But that's for me, and not anyone else.

But since I'm still heavy (and heavier than I have ever been), I am appreciating the tips on avoiding thigh chafe. And between sunscreen and dust, I've never gotten sunburned at BM. I think the dust must be SPF 50.
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby FeetOfClay » Mon Jul 30, 2012 11:41 am

The thing that I think about when considering public nudity is that we live in a society where women's bodies are considered public property, and this notion is reinforced through media, interactions with other people, the viewpoints of our friends and acquaintances, the things our mother's teach us about what's appropriate to wear in public and what's not, among other things.

But I feel that my body is irrevocably my property and no one else's, and daily, I feel that conflict between what I believe and know to be true and what's nastily floating around there about women's bodies out in the default world. So, to even decide to be nude in a safe space like Burning Man is still fraught with this conflict. It's kind of like what some notable gay figures have written about PDA's in public, about how the simple act of caressing your loved one becomes some huge mental effort because you're always aware that there are people out there who're violently opposed to your very existence and who even feel entitled to that feeling and don't see anything wrong with the way they think. And you also know that, to those unfortunately numerous people, a simple PDA is like saying, 'hey, come over here and harass me.'

It's the same thing, even though I simply enjoy nudity and am actually topless as I write this post in the privacy of my own home, know that there is a sizable chuck of the population out there who is violently opposed to the thought that my body is no one else's by my own, and that my decision to be nude would be taken as less to do with the fact that I just enjoy being nude, and become an open invitation to harassment and potential violence against my person.

It's not a light decision.


The above post is brilliant; this is exactly how I feel. I just like to feel wind and sun on my nips...it's goddamn SOCIETY that needs to make it more complicated than that! :)
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby stinkyfoot » Mon Jul 30, 2012 3:13 pm

theCryptofishist wrote:And if you've ever spent much time with small children, you'll find that they will strip off at just about any provokation.


When I was a kid, clothes were definitely my mortal enemy. Makes me feel bad for my mother.
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby HoopNymph » Tue Jul 31, 2012 1:15 pm

My healthy thighs have rubbed raw at every weight I have ever been and I love wearing skirts and dresses. Just a few years ago I discovered Hoo-Ha Ride Glide Bikers Creme. Blissful smooth rub region with no bumps or chaffing. It comes in a black tube in the $20 price range at my local bike shop. If yours does not have it, they can probably order it. Or I found it here .http://www.reflectsports.com/anti-chafing-skin-cream
Worth a try!
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby RedHeaven » Tue Jul 31, 2012 10:17 pm

If I had medium to small boobs, I would love to go topless for that free feeling, for fun fashion....
However I have large melons, it's a lot tougher to go topless. People stare. HARD
How can they not? They are big and nipply and LOUD. Fuggg that....I never go naked at Burning Man, and thats OK. I can barely play dress up....But I do go out of my usual limits, which is fun enough for me! :mrgreen:
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby ohCarie » Tue Jul 31, 2012 10:24 pm

YES--I have been having the same issue! After gaining about 10lbs (apparently the straw that broke the camel's back) I've noticed what is apparently affectionately called chub rub. It only happens in the summer and only when I wear skirts or go bare. I've narrowed sweat down as the main culprit. Baby powder does NOTHING.

I usually wear things that look like bike shorts, but are really undergarments, girdle-esque, even cut off tights (hanes outlet has light, super-stretchy ones now for $15 that rock). The problem is that I want to wear skimpy outfits at TTITD and it gets hard to work the shorts into the look. Last year I even tried large bandaids on my thighs after a particularly horrible rash. Not really a good solution.

I bought monistat glide as the reviews on Amazon said it was the best. I find that it only kinda works. I am going to try it with anti-perspirant as another poster suggested, maybe even with the zinc. Heck I'll try anything!

I've really been agonizing over this. You ePlaya girls really read my mind (as usual). Love! :D
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby CarrieSnarf » Mon Aug 06, 2012 6:51 pm

Girl. Love your curves. I may jiggle in the middle, but I still look good. (Plus, if I loose the weight, I loose tits, and no one wants that). Burning man was the first place I walked in public with a bared midriff and to my delight was complimented by more than few. We burners may be snarky about somethings, but not this. Take a shot of vodka, have a brave moment, put the costume on and leave your tent before you think too much about it.

I am clearly not prominently featured in any videos made by 21 year old frat boys and posted on YouTube. They'll figure out what they're missing later in life. Boney hips make for ouchie bruises and I don't break.

I too rock the bike shorts. I in fact just bought a bunch to match my costumes. and for those costumes where the bike shorts really aren't cutting it, you must get body glide.
http://www.amazon.com/Bodyglide-Anti-ch ... anti+chafe

And then care for the skin- baby wipes and moisturize.
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby FridayFreckled » Tue Aug 07, 2012 10:19 am

I've been a nude model and adult webmistress for 16 years and understand your conundrum. My first burn, I was 170# and had a fantastic, amazing time. And chafed the hell outta my thighs.

Subsequent burns I've been varying weights, up to almost 270#, and back down again. And now I ALWAYS pack cotton bike shorts to wear under skirts. I tried baby powder, anti-chafing stuff (for cyclists), diaper creme, and just about anything else you can think of.... and bike shorts are without a doubt the most comfortable, best option. Now, I don't hesitate to layer them with fun tights at night, or just on their own during the day. Cotton ones breathe well and work best, IMO. I don't like how they tend to have a tighter elastic at the bottom, so I just cut that part off.

In recent years, I've started wearing dance pants instead of skirts a lot of the time. Flare legs, crazy sparkles, slit to the knees, and loads of fun. Easy to move in, can still be layered with skirts if I want, and totally chafe-proof.

And trust me, even though most of the videos and photos you see are of our more slender counterparts, there are lots and lots of luscious, voluptuous women out there of every shape and build. There were when I was 24, and there are even more now that I'm 39. ;D

My wardrobe is still sexy, sassy, silly, shiny, sparkly, and spectacular. It also is sensible. Shoes/boots that I can actually walk and dance in... fishnets OVER cotton socks (inside my boots - fishnets right on feet are a recipe for blisters) and UNDER bike shorts.... fabrics that don't itch or scratch and that stretch and flow. It can all be done while rocking whatever Burner fashion your heart desires!

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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby FeetOfClay » Tue Aug 07, 2012 10:33 am

LOVE your post, Friday Freckled, and I could not agree more!!! In fact, I've been sewing bike shorts in funky fabrics so that they don't seem so utilitarian (read: boring) to me! and i think dance pants may become my go-to option rather than skirts.

i even sewed a sexy chocolate brown one-piece jumpsuit for myself; meow! :twisted:
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby Savannah » Tue Aug 07, 2012 11:01 am

Killer first post, FridayFreckled! :D Welcome to the board.

I do the socks-under-fishnets trick, too. Saves my toes.
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby stinkyfoot » Tue Aug 07, 2012 11:47 am

CarrieSnarf wrote:Boney hips make for ouchie bruises and I don't break.



It's not right to disrespect bony hips just like it's not right to disrespect chafy thighs.
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby CarrieSnarf » Wed Aug 08, 2012 11:21 am

It's not right to disrespect bony hips just like it's not right to disrespect chafy thighs.


I certainly did not mean to step on the boney toes of the boney hipped crowd. Any bitterness you feel is formed from years of mental torture from my mother, the media, the goddamn First lady, whoever about what a goddamn national tragedy it is that I'm chubby. Please feel free to console yourself in the knowledge that you are society's ideal body shape. Really not sure why the boney hipped crowd would read this thread. Morbid curiosity about how the chubby half lives maybe?
And no one loves chafy thighs- especially those of us who are burdened with them. Love the thighs. Not the chafe. This thread is in fact about the destruction of chafe at all cost. Now leave the fat kids alone so we can talk about how we can deal.

And even better than fishnets with socks under is to get the legging style fish nets (no feet) and just wear boot socks. No pulling on the toes. VERY comfortable. Slightly harder to find, but worth the hunt.
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby Savannah » Wed Aug 08, 2012 11:57 am

If footless fishnets cannot be found, fishnets may also be cut across the ankles (or lower) without them unraveling. Then the crotch doesn't sit annoyingly low.
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby FIGJAM » Wed Aug 08, 2012 1:41 pm

Savannah wrote: Then the crotch doesn't sit annoyingly low.



Harriet Flapsaddle?

Is that you my long lost love? :wink:
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby Savannah » Wed Aug 08, 2012 1:52 pm

I'm Harriet Highcrotch, love! Of the New Hampshire Highcrotches.

You're thinking of my maiden aunt.
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby FIGJAM » Wed Aug 08, 2012 2:04 pm

She let me call her Harry...sigh. 8)
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby ygmir » Wed Aug 08, 2012 2:05 pm

Savannah wrote:If footless fishnets cannot be found, fishnets may also be cut across the ankles (or lower) without them unraveling. Then the crotch doesn't sit annoyingly low.


*contemplating what problem a low crotch would pose*
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby FIGJAM » Wed Aug 08, 2012 2:18 pm

ygmir wrote:
Savannah wrote:If footless fishnets cannot be found, fishnets may also be cut across the ankles (or lower) without them unraveling. Then the crotch doesn't sit annoyingly low.


*contemplating what problem a low crotch would pose*



For starters you could be nibbled to death by ducks!!! :shock:
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby Savannah » Wed Aug 08, 2012 2:20 pm

ygmir wrote:
Savannah wrote:If footless fishnets cannot be found, fishnets may also be cut across the ankles (or lower) without them unraveling. Then the crotch doesn't sit annoyingly low.


*contemplating what problem a low crotch would pose*


1) Greater temptation to smuggle red seedless grapes into California, and 2) a need to associate with low-down men.
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby ygmir » Wed Aug 08, 2012 2:22 pm

*lays on back in grass*
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby stinkyfoot » Wed Aug 08, 2012 2:31 pm

CarrieSnarf wrote:
Please feel free to console yourself in the knowledge that you are society's ideal body shape. Really not sure why the boney hipped crowd would read this thread. Morbid curiosity about how the chubby half lives maybe?
And no one loves chafy thighs- especially those of us who are burdened with them. Love the thighs. Not the chafe. This thread is in fact about the destruction of chafe at all cost. Now leave the fat kids alone so we can talk about how we can deal.


I'm not either chubby or bony, I do like cycling, though, so I know a lot about chafing and bike shorts, although I found the content of this thread to be more interesting than that.
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby MacGlenver » Fri Aug 10, 2012 7:23 am

I'm 6'3", 230lbs with some big thighs. I can tell you I would have been immobilized last year by day 4 or 5 if I didnt have moisturizer for my ass/thighs. We bought big bottles but somehow they got lost, so I had nothing for ~5 days until I was so desperate I asked around the rest of our camp and took my friend's sister in law's moisturizer for the rest of the trip. I applied that stuff on my ass 3x/night. Do not leave home w/o it. I got so desperate at one point before the moisturizer that I applied duct tape to the inside of my cheeks.

Pro Tip: Stuff with menthol or peppermint or whatever that shit was, STINGS when applied to a highly chaffed area :). At least I knew it was working!

My burgin friend that is coming this year is a runner and recommends something with a numbing element to it, or vaseline. I plan to have all of the above + moisturizer. I have bike-short-esq underwear, but that doesnt help my ass, just my thighs a bit.
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby DrYes » Fri Aug 10, 2012 7:36 am

MacGlenver wrote:
My burgin friend that is coming this year is a runner and recommends something with a numbing element to it, or vaseline. I plan to have all of the above + moisturizer. I have bike-short-esq underwear, but that doesnt help my ass, just my thighs a bit.


I don't have a problem with chafing on the playa, but when I surf (or do anything in the ocean), I get the worst chafing on my inner thighs afterwards, until I rinse in fresh water at least. It gets horribly painful. I also chafe something awful on the back of my neck where my wetsuit rubs up against it.

Vaseline = pure gold! I put it on my inner thighs and back of my neck now, and don't chafe at all! It's a bit gross because vaseline isn't water soluble at all, so it really sticks around for awhile.....but that means you don't have to reapply very often at all.
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby MacGlenver » Fri Aug 10, 2012 7:51 am

DrYes wrote:Vaseline = pure gold! I put it on my inner thighs and back of my neck now, and don't chafe at all! It's a bit gross because vaseline isn't water soluble at all, so it really sticks around for awhile.....but that means you don't have to reapply very often at all.


Glad to hear it! Will be loading up.

2 Additional notes:
1) Everything that BBadger said is exactly correct. No one gives a shit what you do or how you look -- you are background noise to almost everyone. The only positive/negative impression anyone will get of you is when they meet you.

2) I want to print out Simon's first comment. I knew he had a heart of gold!
"just two indecisive cowboys, trying to play a word game." - piehole
"Just apply intelligence and discretion and you should be able to get away with just about anything." - Ugly Dougly
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MacGlenver
 
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Re: Bike Shorts, Body Image, Thigh Chafe, and Self-Acceptanc

Postby FridayFreckled » Sat Aug 11, 2012 7:42 pm

Savannah wrote:Killer first post, FridayFreckled! :D Welcome to the board.

I do the socks-under-fishnets trick, too. Saves my toes.


Thank you! I couldn't resist commenting on this topic -- it's one that's close to my heart (and other parts!) on many levels. :)
I tend to be a lurker and reader more than a commenter online.

FeetOfClay wrote:LOVE your post, Friday Freckled, and I could not agree more!!! In fact, I've been sewing bike shorts in funky fabrics so that they don't seem so utilitarian (read: boring) to me! and i think dance pants may become my go-to option rather than skirts.

i even sewed a sexy chocolate brown one-piece jumpsuit for myself; meow! :twisted:


And, thanks!! I envy your craftiness. I can mend, but not sew -- though I've started taking classes from a local Burner lovely who's recently started a business teaching sewing skills. :D

Jumpsuit... FUN! I have a few catsuits that I adore, but I've had to make them more porta-pottie friendly with some crotch adjustments.... I hate having to strip to pee, especially in the chilly wee hours of the morning. *laugh*

I've picked up a few pair of modified/DIY dance pants at clothing swaps -- yoga pants or slacks where the side seams are cut and then inset with other fabric swathes -- that fit my hips better than most off-the-shelf dance gear. I'm heavier through the hips and thighs, so even when some dance pants fit my waist, they ride lower than I'd prefer over my booty, especially when I'm out dancing for hours. The DIY ones are as comfortable as pyjamas, but more fun!
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FridayFreckled
 
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