JOB: Jaded Old Burgin. Someone who so desperately wants to be a stealth virgin, not only have they invested heavily in preparation, but they are on every possible Burning Man site, offering opinions, parroting advice, quoting the Principles, and posting every link with a vague connection to the event.
One can only hope real playa dust, heated up and applied via an alpha whiteout, is a cure.
Some sunshine, some dust, a little paint and a tutu. Yeah.