The 3rd revision to the Baal-Mart Floorplan is posted! All Hail Baal!!!Link to High Quality Imagehttp://www.flickr.com/photos/68304241@N08/6988280529/
Los Angeles based MAL-MART presents BAAL-MART 2012. This year Mal-Mart is grabbing you by the BAALs.
(FYI - BAAL is a 14th Century BC Phoenician God of Fertility)
Now recruiting for: Ticketed Co-Campers
Please send a Private Message to PopTart, the E-Playa Mal-Mart Coordinator for more info. We also have a Topic in the 2012 Theme Camps forum, a website (http://www.mal-mart.org
), and an open Facebook group (http://www.facebook.com/#!/groups/MalMart/
For 2012, we plan to go BAALs deep with BAAL-MART; the camp of your wet dreams. Diversely comprised of campers with varying backgrounds including seasoned burners, bushy-tailed virgins, classical musicians, rocket scientists, ballet dancers, doctors, gays, straights and everything in between, BAAL-MART does not designate any single identity for its members other than pretty awesome. Our time is spent providing shelter and activites for active BAAL-MARTers and contributing to/participating with the community and ideals of Black Rock City. While some camp members can live in the structure, BAAL-MART will accommodate as many tents, RVs, small domes, yerts or those weird buildings that look like tin foil glued to cardboard, that can fit in our allocated space. Despite our updated apropos name, we will continue to promote the soul and traditions of Mal-Mart by following our supermart format where "shoppers" will be greeted and encouraged to browse our goods and services or climb our 80 foot(estimation) shaft tower.
Some successful Mal-Mart initiatives that will be returning for 2012 include:
**NIGHTLY PARTIES with some of BMs most celebrated DJs that will both make you feel sassy and shake your chassis
**THE RX BAR where burners of age can step on up for a consultation from our overqualified pharmaceutical magicians. Our drinks are poured strong and will cure whatever ails you
**THE GARDEN CENTER provides a place where BAAL-MARTers can lounge and greet shoppers
**THE PLAYA ART GALLERY lined with our camp partner's favorite images
**THE CRAP is fully stocked to satisfy all the dusty couture needs of our BM Shoppers
BAAL-MART camper privileges:
Choice of accommodations (limited availability) that you can call home for the week
Access to kitchen appliances (with some simple clean as you go rules)
Full access to all levels of the structure including the top of the shaft for viewing major events (ie the man burn)
Access to ride BAALs DEEP, BAAL-MART's own mutant vehicle that will take daily (and nightly) jaunts to the deep playa.
Bragging rights that you live in THE TALLEST ERECTION ON THE PLAYA.
BAAL-MART camper responsibilities:
Camp Dues - amount TBD which goes to the rental of our structure
MOOP Patrol - daily sweeps and an all-out cleaning during and after Teardown
TEARDOWN - many hands make light work, so a communal effort to lower our erection on Sunday is vital
Kitchen Cleanup - there are no maids or chefs in our camp, so you are expected to bring all the food and water you need, clean up as you go, and store and remove your own trash
MISSION ON THEME
At first glance, onlookers will be able to immediately place the phallic inspiration for the contour of our structure. Yes, it's a ten story tall twizzler of love. But we encourage all who gaze upon our dusty home to not settle for such a on-the-nose interpretation of our scaffold erection(hehe). Through the feminist, post-feminist and post-post-feminist agendas (and through the fact that many men are assholes) the world's perception of the schlong has gone awry. On the contrary, a penis engages in oral sex every 2.6 seconds. The male genitalia has honorably garnered an infinite number of garishly crude nicknames throughout the history of the spoken language such as tubesteak, veinous maximus and weapon of ass destruction. Baal-Mart, with its double geodesic living domes and central tower, will stand on a foundation to inspire, affirm, change, evolve or fertilize the community's relationship with the spam javelin, whatever that may be. We have no intention of creating one common opinion for the goo bazooka. We just want to celebrate all the diverse beliefs and attitudes toward this very important character in the Fertility story while welcoming visitors to our store front to stock up on some awesome.