Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Questions, answers, tips & tricks for newbies and veterans alike

Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby lazerfox » Sat Jan 14, 2012 5:23 pm

Another good tip from this thread: Never (EVER) pass out at knowmad's camp
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby FlyingMonkey » Sun Jan 15, 2012 12:46 pm

Just a thought......how about wearing a mask? Once behind a mask no one can identify you & you can be whoever you want to be.

Two words, Liquid Latex :mrgreen: !
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby accordionMan » Thu Jan 26, 2012 1:37 pm

Great advice about smiling.

Also, when it comes to starting a conversation.... just be honest.

There must be something that stands out about the person you are interested in starting a conversation with... "Hey that's a cool necklace...did you make it?" or "You would not believe what I just saw".

As long as it is from the heart and you are wearing a smile, things will be smooth going. And if it's not... say bye bye, there are 49,999 other people to talk to.

The more you practice, the easier it will be.
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby waynerd » Fri Feb 03, 2012 12:47 pm

Thank you to Brody for the post and everyone that chimed in afterward. All your posts have given me ideas and confidence and for that I thank you. I don't consider myself deathly shy but definitely self conscious. Ironically I've played music in front of thousands of people yet get me wandering around a group without a wing man and I can clam up verbally and physically. I've always wanted to come to BM but my timing was always off. Then this year I decided to MAKE it happen. Over 40, not a lot of money to do cool theme related things, a little self conscious about the "passing of my youth" (and being far from fucking finished with it) and then here I find myself in the middle of the divide that the ticket fiasco seems to be causing, a virgin with a ticket. Making me sometimes question whether I belong at BM at all.

But the more I read here, (and trust me I'm reading) the more I find that I have nothing to worry about, that keeping positive will attract the same and I'll have a great time. This post just made it clearer to me that I will (and can) meet new people at BM and have a great time. I look forward to meeting as many of you all as possible.

Until then, Cheers
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby AntiM » Fri Feb 03, 2012 12:48 pm

You belong.

It will be an interesting year!
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby waynerd » Fri Feb 03, 2012 1:01 pm

AntiM wrote:You belong.

It will be an interesting year!


Thanks AntiM!! :)
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby aka'aka » Mon Feb 06, 2012 10:08 pm

Hello waynerd, I also am fairly shy and i decided to attend BM in '08 completely solo. It was one of the most amazing experiances i have ever had. I was immediatly greeted by all sorts of outgoing people with big smiles and hugs. Believe me when i say you are more than welcome. Whenever i get that overwhelming feeling of uneasiness and self doubt, i remember to take a deep breath and smile. :mrgreen:
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby waynerd » Tue Feb 07, 2012 9:08 am

aka'aka wrote:Hello waynerd, I also am fairly shy and i decided to attend BM in '08 completely solo. It was one of the most amazing experiances i have ever had. I was immediatly greeted by all sorts of outgoing people with big smiles and hugs. Believe me when i say you are more than welcome. Whenever i get that overwhelming feeling of uneasiness and self doubt, i remember to take a deep breath and smile. :mrgreen:


Thanks aka'aka,

I'm feeling good about it too. I'm guessing this excitement I have to finally be going will last the next months until I'm THERE! :)
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby hotmess » Wed Feb 08, 2012 3:55 pm

TIP: if you are really shy just go by yourself. I did my first year and it was the best experience EVER. I was supposed to go with a friend and he backed out. I said fuck it and went. And you know what, I made SOOOOOOOOOOO many new friends.
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby waynerd » Wed Feb 08, 2012 4:03 pm

hotmess wrote:TIP: if you are really shy just go by yourself. I did my first year and it was the best experience EVER. I was supposed to go with a friend and he backed out. I said fuck it and went. And you know what, I made SOOOOOOOOOOO many new friends.


OH I am Hotmess. Another solo trip for me (I've done many road trips by myself for my photography). Only this time I'll be hanging out with 40,000 new friends. :)
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby hotmess » Fri Feb 10, 2012 8:08 am

40,000 new friends + the playa = one good time

Feel free to stop by Kamp Krusty. We always open our arms to all those that stumble to the edge of the playa. Hopefully I will make it out there with my camp this year and I can be one of those 40,000 new friends you meet.
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby waynerd » Fri Feb 10, 2012 8:20 am

hotmess wrote:40,000 new friends + the playa = one good time

Feel free to stop by Kamp Krusty. We always open our arms to all those that stumble to the edge of the playa. Hopefully I will make it out there with my camp this year and I can be one of those 40,000 new friends you meet.


Sounds good to me, Kamp Krusty it is! :D
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby knowmad » Fri Feb 10, 2012 12:56 pm

Whaaaaaaa? That whole "Dont pass out at Knowmad's camp" thing at the top of the page is sooooooo. not true.
first that's not me!(a)
second Bunnies are your Friends, the playa is full of them and bout all I can say is if theys wearin bunny ears they prolly ar pretty easy going. (some poor human is going to come try to prove me wrong by example A).

kinda brings me to an Idea for folks who might want to streach thier comfort zone a bit. Getting a pair of bunny ears is a good way to break the Ice. at first you might be surprised at how silly you feel, then you might start thinking how nice everyone is treating you, then you ralize that you don't have to be that scared uncomfortable human, then you feel a bit bad for the carrots but that goes away.
I wear my ears in defaultia somtimes. it helps.
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby Savannah » Fri Feb 10, 2012 12:59 pm

Bunny ears (or other animal ears, deely-bobbers, etc) are adorable on everyone. I approve. :D I think they make even a serious or otherwise plainly dressed person look approachable, and like they have a sense of humor . . .

knowmad wrote:Whaaaaaaa? That whole "Dont pass out at Knowmad's camp" thing at the top of the page is sooooooo. not true.


It's a TRAP. :shock:
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby jella » Fri Feb 10, 2012 1:10 pm

Savannah wrote:Bunny ears (or other animal ears, deely-bobbers, etc) are adorable on everyone. I approve. :D I think they make even a serious or otherwise plainly dressed person look approachable, and like they have a sense of humor . . .

knowmad wrote:Whaaaaaaa? That whole "Dont pass out at Knowmad's camp" thing at the top of the page is sooooooo. not true.


It's a TRAP. :shock:

Personally, I prefer horns :wink:
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby Savannah » Fri Feb 10, 2012 1:20 pm

Horns suit you. :twisted:

I like antlers . . .
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby ygmir » Fri Feb 10, 2012 1:29 pm

jella wrote:
Savannah wrote:Bunny ears (or other animal ears, deely-bobbers, etc) are adorable on everyone. I approve. :D I think they make even a serious or otherwise plainly dressed person look approachable, and like they have a sense of humor . . .

knowmad wrote:Whaaaaaaa? That whole "Dont pass out at Knowmad's camp" thing at the top of the page is sooooooo. not true.


It's a TRAP. :shock:

Personally, I prefer horns :wink:


good attitude.

signed:


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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby jella » Fri Feb 10, 2012 1:30 pm

Thanks Savannah..You look smashing in Antlers I might add :)

Why thank you Yggy :twisted:
Last edited by jella on Fri Feb 10, 2012 1:33 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby knowmad » Fri Feb 10, 2012 1:31 pm

Savannah wrote:Bunny ears (or other animal ears, deely-bobbers, etc) are adorable on everyone. I approve. :D I think they make even a serious or otherwise plainly dressed person look approachable, and like they have a sense of humor . . .

knowmad wrote:Whaaaaaaa? That whole "Dont pass out at Knowmad's camp" thing at the top of the page is sooooooo. not true.


It's a TRAP. :shock:

Nahhh It's ok...
I'm one of yooooouuu!
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby Savannah » Fri Feb 10, 2012 1:42 pm

:lol: :lol:
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby hotmess » Mon Feb 13, 2012 3:08 pm

waynerd wrote:[Sounds good to me, Kamp Krusty it is! :D



Cool Waynerd. I will fill you on more of our camp details as we get closer to the burn. Also, if you want to camp with us you are more them welcome. Keep in touch!!!!! :P
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby waynerd » Mon Feb 13, 2012 3:45 pm

hotmess wrote:
waynerd wrote:[Sounds good to me, Kamp Krusty it is! :D



Cool Waynerd. I will fill you on more of our camp details as we get closer to the burn. Also, if you want to camp with us you are more them welcome. Keep in touch!!!!! :P


I will keep you posted Hotmess, Thank you.
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby lazerfox » Mon Feb 13, 2012 3:52 pm

Screw just a tiny animal part...I wear an entire wolf head on mine. :roll:
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby graidawg » Wed Feb 15, 2012 6:57 am

when i was young i was given 2 pieces of advice that have served me well.

when you are ahead quit.
if you want to get ahead, get a hat
so i got a hat.

top hats are cool also they hide the horns/antlers/ears but still alllowing me to feel like i am a bunny/demon/appraochable by savannah thereby completely hiding the FACT that i am the shyest person in the world, sometimes I am So SHY I wont even talk to myself.
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Re: Burning Man Tips for Shy People

Postby LanceThruster » Fri Feb 17, 2012 4:30 pm

BBadger wrote:Awesome post.

[snip]

One fun thing I've found that helps breaking your own ice is to just get out there and dance. It feels like one of the most ridiculous things to do, but you're out there, doing it. What know what is even better? Teaching a friend how to do do a dance, in public, in that random dance area.

But what? You don't know "how" to dance? (as if anyone else does) Afraid you'll look awkward, like you're doing "the idiot" like Jeff Goldblum on an SNL skit? Not if you know what you're doing!

Teach your friends the "Grocery Shopper". It's so easy to remember and it looks like you're a pro dancer. It's great to teach too: hold one hand and grip the handle of an invisible grocery cart. Now start struttin' down the aisles of make-believe food. Yeah, strut that shit like you have your headphones on. Grab that invisible jar of peanut butter off one of the shelves, spin that jar around look at the nutritional facts, raising your eyebrows or make a face looking at the sugar content. Oh well, looks good! Put that jar in cart. Or not. But keep on struttin'. Swap hands, that imaginary bag of chips is on the top shelf on the other side. Reach WAAY over; it's on the top shelf. Maybe it's made with Olean oil that'll churn your stomach. Yuck! Put that bag back! A make-believe box of cereal attracts your attention from the bottom shelf, grab that, it's on your list. That's right, it's a shopping experience. And keep on struttin'. ...

The dance looks good, is easy to remember, easy to do, easy to improvise, and easy to teach. The best part is that you'll be thinking about what you're putting in your shopping cart for that moment, while people catch notice and start watching the pro dancer. When someone pauses to watch you, ask him or her if he/she want to learn the dance. It can't be any worse or awkward than already dancing right? It'll usually be a yes, and maybe you'll help another would-be wall-flower. If it's a no, no worries, keep on dancing.

Still, the teaching will be the major ice-breaker. You'll be instructing, demonstrating, encouraging, and approving. You can't afford to be meek and shy. But you'll have the full attention of a complete stranger(s). It can only progress from there.

Man did I get some interested looks from people doing that. It was great. From wall-flower to dancer. So awkward, but a good awkward.

Oh, and if you are on the receiving end to a Grocery Shopping instruction session, make sure you don't refuse. Keep it enthusiastic! It took a bit for someone to come up and ask you to join in, so return that favor.



What great advice! I'm someone who *has* to ascribe to the maxim, "dance like nobody's watching."

A friend taught me 3 great dances to use when we went to Palm Springs to hang out. They were #1) "the Hungry" [take one hand and rub your belly in a rhythmic and stylistic way as you gyrate in whatever fashion floats your boat - can be kind of flirtateous directed at the right chica], #2) "the Truck Driver" [use both hands to operate an imaginary oversized steering wheel - you can even toot the truck horn! - don't forget to regularly stomp on the clutch, gas, and brake as you downshift], and #3) "the Shoveler" [allows you to automatically get the feet involved as you sink the spade into the "dirt" - toss it energetically over your shoulder or in front of you to fill a hole - make sure to tamp it down occasionally!]

Now I have the "Grocery Shopper" to add to my repertoire! I feel like I've graduated to the advanced class! THX
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby LanceThruster » Fri Feb 17, 2012 4:53 pm

(Allen Shamblin/Steve Seskin)

When I was fourteen I was falling fast
For a blue eyed girl in my Homeroom class
Tryin' to find the courage to ask her out
Was like tryin' to get off of a water spout

And what she would've said I can't say
I never did ask and she moved away
But I learned something from my blue eyed girl
Sink or swim you've got to give it a whirl

Life's a dance you learn as you go
Sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow
Don't worry 'bout what you don't know
Life's a dance you learn as you go

The longer I live the more I believe
You do have to give if you want to receive

There's a time to listen, a time to talk
And you might have to crawl even after you walk

Had sure things blow up in my face
Seen a long shot win the race
Been knocked down by the slamming door
Picked myself up and came back for more

Life's a dance you learn as you go
Sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow
Don't worry 'bout what you don't know
Life's a dance you learn as you go

Life's a dance you learn as you go
Sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow
Don't worry 'bout what you don't know
Life's a dance you learn as you go

Life's a dance you learn as you go
Sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow
Don't worry 'bout what you don't know
Life's a dance you learn as you go

Life's a dance
Life's a dance
Life's a dance
Take a chance on love
Life's a dance
You learn as you go
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby knowmad » Tue Feb 21, 2012 2:21 pm

You could give pole dancing a try.

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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby LanceThruster » Wed Feb 22, 2012 5:04 pm

Looks a little bit like "The Hungry" (or even "The Truck Driver").

xD

knowmad wrote: You could give pole dancing a try.

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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby Foxfur » Wed Feb 22, 2012 10:48 pm

Yay Lancethruster! Good to see you around :)
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Re: Tips for Shy People at Burning Man

Postby LanceThruster » Thu Feb 23, 2012 3:42 pm

Foxfur wrote:Yay Lancethruster! Good to see you around :)


You too, Foxfur.

Hope the world's been treating you well (I already know how you treat the world - UR a good man indeed).
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