Sad...when I should be extremely happy

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Sad...when I should be extremely happy

Postby Brianna_Beauty413 » Wed Feb 01, 2012 12:26 pm

I was one of the fortunate ones...I got selected to go to BM. Two tickets - one for my husband and one for myself. But the more I read the forums the more I think about just selling mine back to the STEP program. It seems everyone has lost the BM spirit. Camps are getting split up, some of them are backing out. I've heard more than a couple people say that last year really was the "last year" for Burning Man....but wait.... Why is everybody letting the 'big wigs' of the organization ruin the experience for everyone? There is still hope. Give the STEP program and second sale a chance. Burning Man is about THE PEOPLE and the people will find a way to prevail. Don't let something like this ruin your spirit. If you want to go you will find a way! I know it may seem easy for me to say this because I was one of the 'lucky' ones. But it's not. It hurts me that my first BM experience may be all but completely destroyed because of some stupid new system. I've been wanting to go to Burning Man for years...and now, the first time I actually get the chance to become a real burner - it fails. don't let it fail! Don't let the flame of Burning Man flicker away! It's the one time of the year where thousands of people can come together to make something more of humanity. To show the world that there's more to life than the strenuous cycle of stress that our lives have become.... Isn't there anybody out there that feels the same way? Don't give up hope fellow burners and birgins! If everyone works together, hopefully we'll ALL get to feel the playa under our feet this Summer...

Best of luck!

love,
Bri<3
"One good thing about music: When it hits you - you feel no pain" - Bob Marley
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Re: Sad...when I should be extremely happy

Postby gibson_ » Wed Feb 01, 2012 12:30 pm

I think it will feel really weird out there this year for the people that get to go, at least it will for me.

Instead of "we're all sharing in this wonderful thing", it's going to be "I took this wonderful thing from somebody else. Somebody else is having a shitty day today, and that's why I get to have a good one."

Sucks.
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Re: Sad...when I should be extremely happy

Postby Ataraxist » Wed Feb 01, 2012 12:42 pm

I relate.

My entire camp failed to get a ticket except for me. And this would be my first event. So now if I go at all it will be all alone and without a camp.
NOT only that, but I am picking up a seriously negative vibe from the veterans that this event has been "ruined" in some way. That this system has corrupted the foundation of the BM culture (not that I would know :( ) I am reading multiple reports of abandoned camps... I hope this doesn't landslide.

I may just end up reselling at STEP or as a scalper because of this, but then again, I feel like a majority of the isolated groups will do the same maybe opening the way for my group to come. I am at a loss as to what to do.
As of right now, the group of vets I intended to follow have all bailed due to lack o tickets, I am campless with 0 experience. Let me know if you need an extra pair of hands. :)
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Re: Sad...when I should be extremely happy

Postby Timezone LaFontaine » Wed Feb 01, 2012 12:43 pm

Unless you gamed the system somehow, why would you feel guilty? It may or may not become apparent that the ticket system is fundamentally flawed, or it could be that it's the best option out of many imperfect options... in any case, there are many reasons every year why someone might not be able to go. I didn't get to go last year but I wasn't trying to lay a bum trip on the people who did get to go. No one who went last year took anything away from me in order to do it, nor did I take it away from anyone this year. Not that I don't feel sympathetic for the people who didn't get a ticket (in this second of four opportunities to get tickets). I think you have good hearts to feel empathy for the people who didn't get a ticket yet. But come on.
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Re: Sad...when I should be extremely happy

Postby gibson_ » Wed Feb 01, 2012 12:48 pm

It's survivor's guilt.

Last year, if you were there and other people weren't, you could tell yourself that it was because you were more responsible about it. You registered earlier, had your shit more together, etc., and that is why you got to go.

This year, that "self reliance" thing went away. If you're going it's not because you were responsible and planned accordingly, it's because you got lucky. That sucks, and that's going to feel shitty.
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Re: Sad...when I should be extremely happy

Postby wh..sh » Wed Feb 01, 2012 12:53 pm

I know your feeling Brianna. I have been thinking a lot since this morning about this.

I remember last year, when I logged in some week in Feb and bought my $320 tickets (every other tier was sold out).
And this year, I have been "selected" and I have 2 tickets that I need. But I am not nearly as happy as I was last year. Actually, it's quite the opposite, I am actually a little depressed.
I know many people that I have met, grown to admire and like who haven't gotten their tickets. And honestly, I think they would make burning man a better place than I EVER would. I have been seriously thinking that I should give up my tickets, give it to them and sit out.
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Re: Sad...when I should be extremely happy

Postby RedHeaven » Wed Feb 01, 2012 12:55 pm

We still have to wait til things blow over a bit....Maybe the gaps will be filled in more and there will be some more positive flow going on in a couple months. As of now, it doesnt seem like it is going to be as good of energy as last year (This takes It Was Better Last Year to a whole new meaning) but we still have another process to go through, but some of the magic is a little killed.

We are now feeling the true reprocussions to the sell out last year. During the event, we were still in shock over it.
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Re: Sad...when I should be extremely happy

Postby randomgirl7 » Wed Feb 01, 2012 1:09 pm

I think you are all really sweet to be so empathetic. I think all any real burner wants to is the burner spirit to continue - that those who got tickets instead of us goes out and participates in every way they can. The moments where a lot of us without tickets get angry are when we think who might be going instead (people without the spirit) We're all scared we can't go, but more scared that the people going instead will be the worst kinds. Don't feel guilty -- just send your best wishes, go to the burn and show all the virgins what this experience is really about! :)
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Re: Sad...when I should be extremely happy

Postby Litup » Wed Feb 01, 2012 1:18 pm

I was going to place this in a different thread, but this seemed like a more appropriate place for it. So here goes...

IMHO:
As I have said before, this will be my first year at Burning Man. My boyfriend and I have wanted to go for a long time, and we are now financially capable of doing so. We read through the entire survival guide multiple times, started researching everything from travel to shade-structures. We placed ourselves in these forums to begin connecting with the community. We are not tourists. We are good people with a genuine interest in becoming part of something greater than ourselves and plan to fully integrate into the experience. We entered the lottery like everyone else, I at the lowest tier. With a lot of luck, we both won our tickets. I understand everyone's frustration over the lottery and not winning. I know you have all heard it, but there are other options (STEP). Your negative words are not hurting scalpers or 'The Man', just other burners. You make the newcomers feel unworthy of their tickets, as though they are stealing them from the more deserving old-timers. You make us feel unwelcome and tell us that because we won tickets and you didn't, Burning Man will suck this year. You say we have nothing to contribute and that it just isn't fair. Yet, you were all a newcomer once, and how would you have felt if you were rejected upon receiving your ticket, before you even got out to the desert? I wonder if we will even feel welcome when we arrive. I hope this all blows over and that by the time our feet hit the Playa, all the bad vibes have melted away so that it can be the community I’ve seen represented up until this point.
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Re: Sad...when I should be extremely happy

Postby Timezone LaFontaine » Wed Feb 01, 2012 1:22 pm

You should, and I think will, feel welcome when you arrive. And please don't think that the ePlaya represents the whole of the citizenry of Black Rock City.
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Re: Sad...when I should be extremely happy

Postby gibson_ » Wed Feb 01, 2012 1:30 pm

Litup, I promise you that within a few hours of coming into the city, somebody is going to give you a big dusty hug and tell you "Welcome Home.".

I don't think (at least I hope) that anybody is implying that virgins are somehow less deserving, and if they are, fuck those people, read the 10 principles.

I'm just saying that I personally will feel bad this year because of all of the people who wanted to go but couldn't. When I find something good, my tendency is to want to share it with as many people as possible. This could be music, or art, or a fun place to hang out or whatever. The default state is always "give this away".

What sucks is that this year I kindof _can't_ share it with people. Here's this awesome thing that I want to be able to give to everybody I care about, but I can't. We're full up. No more room.

Don't spend even one fucking second feeling unwelcome in any way whatsoever. That is nonsense. You are completely welcome by default. That is one of the foundational elements of this thing.

If anybody ever tells you that you're unwelcome because you're a virgin, then they don't really "get it" and by virtue of the fact that they're being unwelcoming, have lost any sort of authority to comment on anything with regards to this thing at all.

_They're_, unwelcome.
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Re: Sad...when I should be extremely happy

Postby Litup » Wed Feb 01, 2012 1:36 pm

Thanks you, gibson. I'm not sure that everyone on here feels the same way, but it is good to know that at least a few people haven't given up on the 10 principles.
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Re: Sad...when I should be extremely happy

Postby Litup » Wed Feb 01, 2012 1:39 pm

Timezone LaFontaine wrote:You should, and I think will, feel welcome when you arrive. And please don't think that the ePlaya represents the whole of the citizenry of Black Rock City.


I know how forum trolls can be, but it just seems like there is way more negative than positive on here these days. I hope you are right and that it will be the experience I have been looking forward to for so long.
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Re: Sad...when I should be extremely happy

Postby randomgirl7 » Wed Feb 01, 2012 1:42 pm

I agree.. my friend won a ticket and he's a virgin! There are people last year who got tickets as virgins who I thought "Why haven't they been here sooner?"

A virgin doesn't make you less of a burner, it hurts for us who want to return home -- but virgins sometimes need the beauty of burning man even more then the regulars! I think most of us just fear that if there aren't too many veterans there that the spirit might be lost and the virgins won't even get to experience all the amazing things that can be created. I also think most of the virgins people are grumbling about are more the 'weekender' virgins that just hear there's drugs and sex and forget about about the art and community.

Advanced welcome to your home-virgins :)
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Re: Sad...when I should be extremely happy

Postby randomgirl7 » Wed Feb 01, 2012 1:53 pm

Just saw someone quoting this: "i was sad about possibly not being able to go to Black Rock City for my 15th time until i met a Man who had not Burned yet"
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Re: Sad...when I should be extremely happy

Postby Ataraxist » Wed Feb 01, 2012 1:56 pm

randomgirl7 wrote:I think most of us just fear that if there aren't too many veterans there that the spirit might be lost and the virgins won't even get to experience all the amazing things that can be created.



Its a valid fear. As far as I have seen in other communities this CAN happen. :(

(Thanks for the advanced-welcome :D )
As of right now, the group of vets I intended to follow have all bailed due to lack o tickets, I am campless with 0 experience. Let me know if you need an extra pair of hands. :)
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Re: Sad...when I should be extremely happy

Postby drutter » Wed Feb 01, 2012 3:43 pm

Brianna_Beauty413 wrote:I was one of the fortunate ones...I got selected to go to BM. Two tickets - one for my husband and one for myself. But the more I read the forums the more I think about just selling mine back to the STEP program. It seems everyone has lost the BM spirit. Camps are getting split up, some of them are backing out. I've heard more than a couple people say that last year really was the "last year" for Burning Man....but wait.... Why is everybody letting the 'big wigs' of the organization ruin the experience for everyone? There is still hope. Give the STEP program and second sale a chance. Burning Man is about THE PEOPLE and the people will find a way to prevail.

I agree that it's about the people, not the organizers, but that doesn't mean the organizers' horrible actions aren't affecting the people. It'll be hot, it'll be dusty, it'll be fun, and a giant Man will burn down in the desert. I can almost guarantee it. And I predict there will also be lots of love, and great memories made, and the Burning Man spirit will truly still be present. For me, Burning Man has the potential to be more than all that, though, and because of the actions of the organizers (who are profiting handsomely off the lottery system, no bones about it!), that's jeopardized. Just because something is great doesn't mean we shouldn't be upset when it gets taken down a few notches. It's still great, in my opinion. But I love it so much, I want it to be even greater. And it coulda been, if not for a hidden, corrupted, careless few.

Thanks though for not just gloating "I won, therefore the new system is fine", which there has been a fair bit of. :)
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Re: Sad...when I should be extremely happy

Postby Brianna_Beauty413 » Wed Feb 01, 2012 4:19 pm

Thank you all for the responses. I won't be giving my tickets back...It just kinda sucks that everybody who wanted to go so badly might not get to go. Not to mention people who ended up not getting tickets were kind of making the people who DID get tickets feel unwelcome. But that's okay. I think I just needed a reminder that eplaya is not the same as the real playa. I'm sure everything will play itself out and Burning Man will continue to be a wonderful experience year after year to come.
"One good thing about music: When it hits you - you feel no pain" - Bob Marley
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Re: Sad...when I should be extremely happy

Postby wh..sh » Wed Feb 01, 2012 4:23 pm

Brianna_Beauty413 wrote:I think I just needed a reminder that eplaya is not the same as the real playa.


It's already been stated before that "we are the 1%"
In my world there's only legible and more legible.

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Re: Sad...when I should be extremely happy

Postby mournlight » Wed Feb 01, 2012 7:11 pm

Gibson, if you were standing beside me, I'd give you a big hug and say "thanks for the pep talk." I needed that. "Hear, hear" on all you said. I got lucky and am feeling a fair share of guilt about it, and sadness because most of my camp didn't get tickets. But, your message is right on. It will work out and it will be what it should be. Thanks to everyone for being open. And newbies, come enjoy yourselves. You'll do just fine.
~Having fun preparing for a creative world~
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Re: Sad...when I should be extremely happy

Postby pink » Thu Feb 02, 2012 2:49 am

Hey don't feel guilty at all. Lots more of us WILL get tickets; it just sucks to be in limbo. But our camp planning is still in gear, and I won't assume I won't go until 8/27 and I still don't have a ticket. Or later (might be really easy to find one after it starts!)
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