Midwest Burners: a word to the wise-
keep campfire smoke out of your eyes!
cause blisters and boils,
when firewood with ivy vine fries!
This "Ivy", tyrannical scamp,
lives year-round in places you camp,
She's a cold, ruthless bitch
with a relentless itch,
who wanders the woods like a tramp.
Sitting silent, at times undetected,
Her mission is never neglected!
She gives you no warning,
But, oh, in the morning,
you'll know that you've been "selected!"
"Spread the word and let it be known,
Stay away from where I have grown!
Find your own place,
and get outta my face,
as this place I've claimed for my own!"
The insult to injury is smoke.
I assure you: This is no joke!
Cut her vines and then burn,
and most surely you'll learn
her revenge as you collapse and choke.
I've heard stories she's actually killed.
(I do know first-hand she's strong-willed!)
Get her into your lungs,
and your days might be done!
She's a stalker, exceptionally skilled!
Avoidance, as hard as one tries,
may not be enough for this "prize."
Water and bar soap
may be just the dope
to reduce her "kiss" with its lyes.
Products abound to reduce
itching and boiling effuse.
Avoidance is best-
and negates all the rest,
precluding all chemical use!
"Poison" Ivy she's called for a reason!
Sallies forth this time of the season.
"Leaves of three, let her be!"
Sage advice, seems to me,
from the words of a grizzled old woodsman.
I was better last year.