FUCK Lincoln and F U C K their new car.

FUCK Lincoln and F U C K their new car.

Postby Zim » Thu Sep 04, 2008 5:02 am

WTF. Has anyone seen this new Lincoln commercial? Watching Man vs Wild and Daft Punk rocks on in. The car is ON the PLAYA. Fell for it bad before I realized what was going on.

Bullshit and I feel fucked for passing it on. Bust out your goggles before you watch this, I don't want you to get infected.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3K-7Jm09rTI

I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.

Geeeee, this thing DEBUTS two days after we all return. Wonder who they're targeting? Marketing takes aim at the "type of people" (aka 'demographic' aka 'feeding trough') that can abandon everything and spend several grand to get experienced in the middle of nowhere. I can hear the money ticking through their brain, register a cha-chinging.

"By the way, if anyone here is in advertising or marketing, kill yourself. Thank you, thank you. Just a little thought. I'm just trying to plant seeds. Maybe one day they'll take root. I don't know. You try. You do what you can. Kill yourselves. Seriously though, if you are, do. No really, there's no rationalisation for what you do, and you are Satan's little helpers, OK? Kill yourselves, seriously. You're the ruiner of all things good. Seriously, no, this is not a joke. "There's gonna be a joke coming..." There's no fucking joke coming, you are Satan's spawn, filling the world with bile and garbage, you are fucked and you are fucking us, kill yourselves, it's the only way to save your fucking soul. Kill yourself, kill yourself, kill yourself now. Now, back to the show." - The Late Great Bill Hicks.

Pass it on. I want to undo whatever psychological bullshit programming they're putting into the collective consciousness. They can eat shit and die IMHO.
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Postby gyre » Thu Sep 04, 2008 7:37 am

Absolutely.


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Postby Kenny Z » Thu Sep 04, 2008 10:10 am

They also used The Crystal Method - Hi Roller in one of there commercials. I don't know why but using them in retarded commercials totally ruins the songs for me! Fuck Lincoln, Wendy's, Mitsubishi, and all the other companies that try to connect with us by messing with good music. C'mon, the fucking "jingle" doesn't work anymore?
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Postby Miles » Thu Sep 04, 2008 10:58 am

:roll: its just a piece of land, it doesn't belong to you or I or any burner for that matter.

Also, it's likely that it could have been filmed at the bonnivlle salt flats.
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Postby Ugly Dougly » Thu Sep 04, 2008 11:04 am

By the way, Zim, welcome to Eplaya.
Please to visit PAGE TWO.
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Postby Captain Goddammit » Thu Sep 04, 2008 11:30 am

You're SUCH a STUPID asshole!!!
That isn't the goddamm playa you idiot. Ever heard of Muroc, or Bonneville, or any of the numerous other places that most car commercials like that are filmed?
But so what if it was... Exactly what's wrong with an American car company advertising their cars?
You don't think Americans should get to do legitimate business?
F U C K YOU!!! Move somewhere else.
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Postby Klydzdale » Thu Sep 04, 2008 11:49 am

wow...stupidity isn't only native to the default world.
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Postby Kenny Z » Thu Sep 04, 2008 12:21 pm

Holy shit, such passion from both sides on this topic. Maybe we should get in a circle and beat the shit out each other. :?
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Postby theCryptofishist » Thu Sep 04, 2008 12:31 pm

Weren't they filming car commercials there long before the burn arrived?
Simon's real sig line?

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Postby theCryptofishist » Thu Sep 04, 2008 12:40 pm

Now that I think about it, it's hard to believe that we are the intended demographic for a Lincoln.
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Postby Kenny Z » Thu Sep 04, 2008 1:36 pm

theCryptofishist wrote:Now that I think about it, it's hard to believe that we are the intended demographic for a Lincoln.


I honestly don't think they are targeting burners, I think they are trying to target the younger generation. I'd be shocked if Lincoln became a symbol of youth but I've been surprised at the power of marketing before. My only pet peeve is when they take some of my favorite songs and burn them out with their commercials. They have every right to do so, but it still irritates me.
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Postby chiefdanfox » Thu Sep 04, 2008 1:57 pm

not to thread crap, but it was them there cars that made the salt flats (playa) famous. Well, and the bomb. But, since I was a kid in the sixties, and you fuckin whippersnappers (get OFF my lawn) don't remember the Spirit of America (yeah, Rio Vista, CA!), and all those other crazy gearheads, knucklebusters and greasemonkeys, I guess I should just take my Geritol, tighten up my Depends and STFU.
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Postby gyre » Thu Sep 04, 2008 2:22 pm

Don't forget Art Arfons.
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Postby Zim » Thu Sep 04, 2008 2:34 pm

Hahaha, nice. Love the discussion.

Thanks for the welcome Ugly Dougly. ;D

[quote="Miles"]:roll: its just a piece of land, it doesn't belong to you or I or any burner for that matter.

Also, it's likely that it could have been filmed at the bonnivlle salt flats.[/quote]

Never claimed it. If anything it's "owned" by the Native Americans who once lived on this earth before we fucked raped and destroyed them, though they'd never place claim to it.

My beef has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that they _filmed_ on the playa. I don't give a shit if they want to put a fuckin McDonalds out there and serve hamburgers for three months a year. I am _well_ aware that they have been filming car commercials, tv shows, movies, and whatever other garbage the main-stream media spews forth from it's pustulating quivering anus.

My beef is with the targeting, marginalizing and capitalization on the collective experience we've all just endured. Taking that positive energy that we've built and trying to leech it into sales for another fucking atmosphere clogging penis-envy vroom vroom bullshit mobile.

[quote]You're SUCH a STUPID asshole!!!
That isn't the goddamm playa you idiot. Ever heard of Muroc, or Bonneville, or any of the numerous other places that most car commercials like that are filmed?
But so what if it was... Exactly what's wrong with an American car company advertising their cars?
You don't think Americans should get to do legitimate business?
F U C K YOU!!! Move somewhere else.[/quote]

HAHAHAHAHAHA. God yes, touched a nerve did we? I don't give a shit if it's the Bonneville Salt Flats. I grew up in Utah so yes I'm actually quite well aware of them you fucking dipshit.

Here's my philosophy: FUCK AUTOMOBILES. FUCK THEM. THEY ARE FUCKING OVER OUR FUCKING PLANET BECAUSE WE ARE TOO FUCKING LAZY TO USE BIKES. Sit on your fuckin fat ass Captain Goddammit and suck down another burger while you ride your shiny shit-coffin right up Mother Earth's asshole. Rape that shit son, get right up in there and fucking take it to it. Let's just fucking build a three fuckin lane highway to the playa next year! WHY THE FUCK NOT? [b]AMERICA!!![/b] IT'LL CREATE MORE JOBS! MORE JOBS MORE MONEY MORE CAPITALISM!!! FUCK YES! Let's pander to the masses, let's give them everything they could ever want while striping them of their base humanity. Another milkshake sir? Would you like some pornography with your sodium and fucking flesh-factory produced hotdogs?

Define your 'legitimate' business model. Define how exactly you legitimize raping the fucking planet.

FUCK.

YOU.

Get the fuck out of MY America. This is MY dream. A United State of America powered by PEOPLE. By HUMAN FUCKING SPIRIT, SWEAT AND SACRIFICE. Transportation provided by our own two fucking feet. Gee, wonder how nice that would be. A world without obese fuckers mooing down each highway with no destination except for a quick fix they're never going to find. A large gaping hole in their life that they shovel beef and shit into in an unending cycle of destruction and greed. All powered by the 1% of the population that controls our wealth. The 1% of our population that created this commerical. The 1% of our population that doesn't give a shit about you and just wants your damn dirty dollar.

Give it to them Captain Goddammit. Give it to them. Give them everything, sell your fucking soul and buy low sell high.

...

Yeah, I think I like this place. Good conversation, good times. Thanks for reading folks.
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Postby Captain Goddammit » Thu Sep 04, 2008 2:39 pm

Without cars, your precious Burning Man experience wouldn't happen at all.
You're an idiot!
"Whaoomph! Whaomph! Burbbleburbblepattpattpattpatt... WHAAAAAaaoooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa........!!!"
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Postby Zim » Thu Sep 04, 2008 2:44 pm

[quote="Captain Goddammit"]Without cars, your precious Burning Man experience wouldn't happen at all.
You're an idiot![/quote]

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

You're defeated before you even try. Give up. We could never build a utopia without oil. You're right. Let's give up. Don't try, don't try. It's all over, they win. Give in. Give in Captain Goddamnit, go to bed. Pull the covers over your eyes and sooth yourself into a soft relaxing sleep. It's okay, trust us.

Trust us.

You can't win. You can't do anything without oil. Nothing is possible without oil. Those ancient civilizations that created the pyramids, the greek metropolises, Rome, the great wall of China. OIL BABY!!! EVERYTHING THEY CREATED WAS DONE WITH OIL AND CARS.

BEEP MOTHER FUCKING BEEP! Out of the way Aristotle! You're holding up traffic!!! Galileo, get the fuck out of the road asshole!!! Hey Da Vinci, I really dig your new 6 Cylinder combustion engine you just invented. THANKS BUDDY!
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Postby Zim » Thu Sep 04, 2008 2:49 pm

[quote="Kenny Z"]Holy shit, such passion from both sides on this topic. Maybe we should get in a circle and beat the shit out each other. :?[/quote]

Haha, I like your style Kenny. I'm there man.

Burning Man 2009. Thunderdome. You and me Captain Goddamnit. I'll be there with bells on fuckface.
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Postby Captain Goddammit » Thu Sep 04, 2008 2:55 pm

Without cars, your precious Burning Man experience wouldn't happen at all.

If you did anything useful for a living and had a product to sell, you'd do your best to advertise to the people that you thought would be interested in your product. Or you'd fail and go out of business.

You're SUCH an idiot.
"Whaoomph! Whaomph! Burbbleburbblepattpattpattpatt... WHAAAAAaaoooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa........!!!"
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Postby Zim » Thu Sep 04, 2008 2:58 pm

[quote="Captain Goddammit"]Without cars, your precious Burning Man experience wouldn't happen at all.

If you did anything useful for a living and had a product to sell, you'd do your best to advertise to the people that you thought would be interested in your product. Or you'd fail and go out of business.

You're SUCH an idiot.[/quote]

Are you convincing me or are you convincing yourself? Cause either way I don't think you're winning.

A corporation is not a person. If _I_ had a product to sell you're damn fucking straight I'd get the word out! I'd fucking use bright flashy lights and Daft Punk because I enjoy that shit.

If I was fucking selling death, greed, disease, apathy, pain and greed then I would fucking kill myself.

Kill yourself Captain Goddamnit. Do us all a favor, one less car on the road.
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Postby thirt33n » Thu Sep 04, 2008 2:59 pm

...zim, you may just implode before tomorrow.
drink less coffee homey.

you ARE walking to burningman next year right?
blow.
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Postby Zim » Thu Sep 04, 2008 3:01 pm

[quote="thirt33n"]...zim, you may just implode before tomorrow.
drink less coffee homey.

you ARE walking to burningman next year right?[/quote]

Fuck man, at this point I might just to prove a point.

Has anyone ever done it? How long do you think it would take?

At the very least I think I'd get some tang for my trouble, right?

I also enjoy the fact that if someone is passionate about an ideal they are considered 'CRAZY'. Maybe my eyes are just open, maybe I don't want to live with this shit any more. Maybe I want something better for us.
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Postby Captain Goddammit » Thu Sep 04, 2008 3:03 pm

You can't argue with an irrational person, so OK, you "win".
You yelled the loudest and whined the most, therefore you are "right".
But there's several burners over here at my place right now laughing their asses off!
"Whaoomph! Whaomph! Burbbleburbblepattpattpattpatt... WHAAAAAaaoooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa........!!!"
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Postby chiefdanfox » Thu Sep 04, 2008 3:05 pm

I believe it is quite arguable that the transition into a space-faring, ubiquitous information consuming race we now are is directly related to oil, and wars over oil. The nearly 7 billion souls on this planet would probably be more like 1 billion without it. We humans would have something like a 70% mortality rate before age 5.

It also seems that once science began to explain more than superstition, the change into efficient energy usage was inevitable, and oil is just one more link in a chain that started after our local star ignited. We'll move to hydrogen and solar, and things yet discovered or conceived, and oil will be a memory. There will be horrors and downsides to those, and we will have similar rantfests about those...later. Our use of energy will get more efficient, but our demands will continue to climb. Maybe we are evolving into Homo vulcanus
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Postby Zim » Thu Sep 04, 2008 3:05 pm

Captain Goddammit wrote:You can't argue with an irrational person, so OK, you "win".
You yelled the loudest and whined the most, therefore you are "right".
But there's several burners over here at my place right now laughing their asses off!


I'm glad you have friends Captain Goddamnit, lord knows you need them. I'm laughing with them and I'm happy that they're having a positive experience. If all I've done is cause laughter, rather than actually convincing you that you're living in a shell, then I consider that a victory.

Have a good day Captain Goddamnit, I'd like to discuss and have a legitimate conversation with you devoid of anger and hostility. Look me up next year.

chiefdanfox wrote:I believe it is quite arguable that the transition into a space-faring, ubiquitous information consuming race we now are is directly related to oil, and wars over oil. The nearly 7 billion souls on this planet would probably be more like 1 billion without it. We humans would have something like a 70% mortality rate before age 5.

It also seems that once science began to explain more than superstition, the change into efficient energy usage was inevitable, and oil is just one more link in a chain that started after our local star ignited. We'll move to hydrogen and solar, and things yet discovered or conceived, and oil will be a memory. There will be horrors and downsides to those, and we will have similar rantfests about those...later. Our use of energy will get more efficient, but our demands will continue to climb. Maybe we are evolving into Homo vulcanus


Thanks for your thoughts chiefdanfox, I pray that we make it.
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Postby Captain Goddammit » Thu Sep 04, 2008 3:09 pm

Zim wrote: If all I've done is cause laughter, rather than actually convincing you that you're living in a shell, then I consider that a victory.



Like I said, you "win".
"Whaoomph! Whaomph! Burbbleburbblepattpattpattpatt... WHAAAAAaaoooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa........!!!"
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Postby betrdanevr » Thu Sep 04, 2008 3:09 pm

Kenny Z wrote:Holy shit, such passion from both sides on this topic. Maybe we should get in a circle and beat the shit out each other. :?


True that!
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Postby thirt33n » Thu Sep 04, 2008 3:12 pm

Captain Goddammit wrote:You can't argue with an irrational person, so OK, you "win".
You yelled the loudest and whined the most, therefore you are "right".
But there's several burners over here at my place right now laughing their asses off!


...shit, prolly drinkin margaritas too.....your cuervo came back to idaho unopened,.....next time. :wink:
blow.
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Postby gyre » Thu Sep 04, 2008 3:18 pm

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Postby Zim » Thu Sep 04, 2008 3:22 pm

Captain Goddammit wrote:
Zim wrote: If all I've done is cause laughter, rather than actually convincing you that you're living in a shell, then I consider that a victory.



Like I said, you "win".


I'm not trying to 'win' an argument. I'm trying to express my point of view and whether or not you accept that point of view is your prerogative. In order for me to win you would need to bike to work once a week. Try it, I guarantee you'll feel better.

We're having a conversation and I use harsh language. Feel free to join in. It feels good to let it out you know. I'm sorry that you've become the focus of my rage at this state that we're in. People just aren't getting it and I'm tired of seeing this country crumble around me.
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Postby thirt33n » Thu Sep 04, 2008 3:25 pm

one has no control over the american dream, only your american dream.

......fat fast food eatin' tv and video game playin' gas guzzlin smokin' ass mutherfukkers.
blow.
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