Which BMORG member do you fantasize about fucking?

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Which BMORG member do you fantasize about fucking?

Postby JiffyLube » Sun Sep 18, 2005 12:57 am

Personally, I fantasize about fucking Larry Harvey. Here's my fantasy:

It's the night of the Burn and Larry, as usual, has done too many drugs. In fact, he's done so many, that he's standing at the base of the man, for all intents and purposes paralyzed.

I go up to him and I rip off all his clothes--except for his socks and, of course, his hat. As he stands there shivering, his gray, saggy flesh exposed to the cold desert night, one of the Black Rock Rangers comes up to me and asks, "What on earth are you doing?" I reply: "Oh, Larry and I are going to perform a special performance piece for Burning Man, a pagan fertility ritual. Please could you tell the crowd to quieten down a little out of respect for our art?" "Oh, OK," the ranger says. "I will do. Sorry to interrupt."

So, without any further ado, I bend Larry over, part his pimply ass cheeks, and start sodomizing him. At first, he's a little tight. But my hard cock soon bursts several of his hemorrhoids, lubricating his anus nicely with his own blood. Larry--being stoned as usual--doesn't know what to do. He snivels and whimpers a bit, and even tries to cry out to the crowd for help. But, unfortunately for him, those 40,000-odd people are utterly mesmerized by the spectacle of his ritualized sodomy. So he cries out to his BMORG buddies to help him. But Crimson is off somewhere bullying a volunteer, Will Roger is off beating up a woman, and Marian...well, Marian's there, but she's too busy trying to figure out how to gain financially from Larry's sexual humiliation ("Hmm, let's see," she's saying to herself. "If we could initially charge attendees $100 to see Larry sodomized--provided they buy their tickets 8 months in advance--and we then raised the price to $200 and even $300 as we get closer to the event, and if we could get unpaid volunteers to do the sodomizing, and maybe sell the TV rights to Discovery Times Channel...wow, we could make a shitload of dough!").

Then, as I keep thrusting into Larry's anus with my hard member, something beautiful begins to happen: Larry's behind starts thrusting up rhythmically to meet my strokes, and, instead of whimpering, he's now moaning and writhing in pleasure. Unable to contain myself any longer, I whip off his hat, cum copiously into it, and then put it back on his head, so that my cum--not to mention the shit and blood from his torn anus--drip down over his face.

And, as he lies there with my--and his own--bodily fluids dripping down his face, suddenly something even more beautiful happens: he shudders, groans, and his still-flaccid penis emits a couple of drops of sickly-looking, clumpy, yellow cum. "Wow, thanks Jiffy," he moans. "I haven't cum so hard since Marian ass-fucked me with her gasoline-powered studded dildo. I am now definitely your bitch. Please do me again." I happily oblige, to a standing ovation and cries of "Encore! Encore!" from his 40,000 followers.

So I've shared my fantasy. What's yours?
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Postby Kinetic IV » Sun Sep 18, 2005 1:14 am

Admin notified.

Edit: PLEASE READ.
There are a lot of new people here on the eplaya who will read the above post and be tempted to launch a flaming, scathing attack on the author. Resist the urge. The post appears to be the work of a particular person who shows up around here from time to time with a grudge against the LLC, and they like to post stuff like what you see above.

This person thrives off attention and hostile reactions. If you post a rant in this thread you're giving this person exactly what they want.

AGAIN RESIST THE URGE AND DON'T POST HERE. The moderators and admins have been notified and they should clean this up shortly.
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Postby JiffyLube » Sun Sep 18, 2005 1:41 am

What a silly, little, tattle-taling sheepie you are, Kinetic. BTW, I have nothing but admiration for Larry and Marian and the rest of the LLC: they make good money, while providing an outlet for bleating groupthinkers like yourself, who would otherwise be involved in much more pernicious cults.
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Postby DVD » Sun Sep 18, 2005 9:28 am

Kinetic IV wrote:Admin notified.

Edit: PLEASE READ.


Do you even know who JiffyLube is?

Relax. Admin notified? C'mon.


And BTW, my choice is either Electra or Odwally. I'm certain there are others I may choose but I haven't met them all. LLC and friend Orgy?
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Postby Kinetic IV » Sun Sep 18, 2005 9:49 am

Unless you're the same person as DVD Burner who used to be around here, the date on your profile would indicate you have no awareness of some prior eplaya problems. In any event the post clearly violates the TOS and as someone who posts here I have the right to object to the post. I chose to exercise that right.

I don't need to relax either. I happen to like my current state of being, thank you. By the way, thanks for feeding the troll.
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Postby DVD » Sun Sep 18, 2005 9:58 am

Kinetic IV wrote:Unless you're the same person as DVD Burner who used to be around here, the date on your profile would indicate you have no awareness of some prior eplaya problems. In any event the post clearly violates the TOS and as someone who posts here I have the right to object to the post. I chose to exercise that right.

I don't need to relax either. I happen to like my current state of being, thank you. By the way, thanks for feeding the troll.


Eek. When did you move in to No Fun Village? And to suggest that I have no awareness due to name and present and past locality completely vomits on the cyclical nature of the universe and any work that Heisenberg was doing.

I'm curious about those problems though- it seems the board is still here and, looking around, everyone is still alive- so how serious could those problems have been, really?
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Re: Which BMORG member do you fantasize about fucking?

Postby ZaphodBurner » Mon Sep 19, 2005 3:53 pm

JiffyLube wrote:I go up to him and I rip off all his clothes--except for his socks and, of course, his hat.


Well, that's cool, 'cause if you messed with his hat we'd have to kick your ass.

-zb
"The Red Baron is smart.. He never spends the whole night dancing and drinking root beer.. "-The WWI Flying Ace
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Postby spectabillis » Mon Sep 19, 2005 4:19 pm

Kinetic IV wrote:Unless you're the same person as DVD Burner

asked, he is not.

DVD wrote:so how serious could those problems have been, really?

Serious enough, you can use the search function if you are that curious.

Not sure if its related, but a while back there was someone hate posting here as well as tribe around an org person. It was purely a personal grudge and intentional.
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Postby DVD » Mon Sep 19, 2005 5:53 pm

spectabillis wrote:
Kinetic IV wrote:Unless you're the same person as DVD Burner

asked, he is not.

DVD wrote:so how serious could those problems have been, really?

Serious enough, you can use the search function if you are that curious.


Well I have and I see that most participants lived through the terrible sticks and stones milieu. Am I simply missing the thing involving an umbrella and someone's rectum, or a few people just overreacting a bit?
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Postby Kinetic IV » Mon Sep 19, 2005 6:48 pm

So when do we get our admin back that has the power to do anything?

And that post is about like having someone come in and take a shit in the middle of your living room. It mocks the TOS, is an outright personal attack and considering how this stuff was taken care of in the past it's appalling that the post has stayed up so long.

But I guess nobody else cares, I'm sitting out here all alone saying it's not right while everyone else is like whatsa goin on, mee don't see nuthin wrong here. Fuck that, you might as well print out the TOS and use them to wipe your ass. That's about the only use for 'em now.
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Censorship equals Fascism

Postby Captain Fuckwit » Mon Sep 19, 2005 7:38 pm

Censorship equals Fascism.

Sincerely yours,
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Postby Kinetic IV » Mon Sep 19, 2005 8:04 pm

CF, At least you're consistent. I have to give you credit for that.

I had to dig a bit but I realized who you are. And I made a promise to you that I intend to keep. So while I want to say something about your comment, I won't. But your point was noted.

Good luck on your remaining accounts, perhaps logic and reason will overcome the stubborn resistance in time...as I was able to see that the battle continues. Keep giving 'em hell.

But you know I couldn't let you go without a parting shot...

RE: Playing the victim.
In perhaps a slightly different branch of the the same vein, people on the BBS's who are complaining about "thinly veiled [on-line] threats of physical violence toward others" are reconstituting themselves as victims. This is a ploy. This is a problem that needs to be addressed in the BBS community: Cowardly accusations that people are being threatened weaken our ability to recognize what would actually constitute a real and persistant threat of [off-line] executable violence. As I've stipulated before-


No one in their right mind is going to announce on a BBS their intentions of committing assault and battery and then go out and commit the assault: It's a guaranteed jail sentence, not to mention a self-infliction of future remorse and loss of reputation.


This isn't about playing the victim, this is about civility and enforcing a TOS that was established by the community, for the community. Someone's gotta start the process and I chose to speak up.

Consider that a pre-emptive comment / clarification. I know you. You'll find something in that box of yours to smack me with so I might as well swing first and run the prevent defense that I've had luck with in the past.
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Postby spectabillis » Mon Sep 19, 2005 11:32 pm

DVD wrote:...Well I have and I see that most participants lived through the terrible sticks and stones milieu.

Does not mean people still want it to continue, not convinced they should when most agreed - they did not.
...or a few people just overreacting a bit?

Thats often the case. Sometimes I think its a common social reaction to something that prominent which diminishes over time, as with memory.
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Postby Bungiti » Tue Sep 20, 2005 5:47 am

Kinetic IV wrote:


No one in their right mind is going to announce on a BBS their intentions of committing assault and battery and then go out and commit the assault: It's a guaranteed jail sentence, not to mention a self-infliction of future remorse and loss of reputation.




As someone who has defended people charged with A&B in court i know people do stupid thigs all the time, like emailing threats or leaving msgs on voicemail. But you are right, letting your intentions known before hand does ensure jail time. Although that is often little comfort to the person beaten up.
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Postby Isotopia » Sun Sep 25, 2005 5:52 am

Censorship equals Fascism.


Please, stop the asshattery. Surely you don't believe that shite.
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...

Postby the fire elf » Sun Sep 25, 2005 6:05 am

his 40,000 followers.



minus one....

i was following the big stick guy...
instantiate vacuous truth
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...

Postby the fire elf » Sun Sep 25, 2005 6:22 am

my latest thrill is being seduced by beautiful women...

happened at the burn a couple times...

don't imagine i'd put up much resistance for borg women...besides...i hear resistance is futile...
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Postby stevecormell » Sat Oct 08, 2005 4:53 pm

I have to say that I got a boner from reading this.
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...

Postby the fire elf » Tue Oct 11, 2005 3:04 am

well that's what you got...

but whatcha gonna give?
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Postby DarrylVanRhey » Sun Mar 26, 2006 11:34 am

Is this the same Jiffy Lube whose gay-themed art was censored by BMORG and the cops?
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