An express lane at the greeters

Share your pictures and video. Tell us about the sights, sounds, and scents, as well as the rumors and truths found at Burning Man.

An express lane at the greeters

Postby percussivepaul » Mon Sep 12, 2011 4:29 pm

I really don't think this will happen but oh man was I ever wishing for it.

After a four and a half hour wait at the gate coming in with the sun dipping below the mountains on Monday, knowing that a large chunk of our camp had already arrived and was probably hanging out in camp but likely to head out exploring shortly, just itching to get into the city.... I was really not in the mood for ringing the bell and making playa angels, and I was especially not in the mood for waiting another half hour while the cars in front of us did so, and got out for hugs, and posed for photos, and then more hugs, then another playa angel, then more photos, and on and on for fucking ever. We made it by about twenty minutes; a few more cars and we would have arrived to an empty camp.

OK, I remember my first time and I get that it's a magical experience, and I love the greeters for what they do, and I love that people are excited to arrive, and I don't want to take that away. But some of us have done all that and have things to do and people to see and would be really thrilled to have a thirty second hello/welcome home and pick up the survival guide and just roll on through. So how about an optional express lane for veterans?
percussivepaul
 
Posts: 106
Joined: Sat Jul 03, 2010 3:58 pm

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby CapSmashy » Mon Sep 12, 2011 4:35 pm

I support this idea.

We were rolling up to greeter's (came in Thursday night before gate) and saw the creepy naked greeter hug zone in full effect. Jumped the line to an outside kiosk and didn't even unlock the bus door. Jet slid the driver's window open, said Hi, there's four of us, we know where we are going, we need to keep moving.

Been there done that, give me my stuff and let's keep the line moving.
Playawaste Raiders cordially invites you to suck it.
User avatar
CapSmashy
 
Posts: 1919
Joined: Thu Sep 28, 2006 12:29 pm
Location: Awesome Camp 2.0
Burning Since: 2007
Camp Name: Terminal City://404 Village Not Found

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby robrob » Mon Sep 12, 2011 4:41 pm

i said this exact same thing after the gate "man, i wish there was an express lane to skip the hugs and bells" and sure enough, when we got to greeters the dude must have seen the look on our faces, and the fact that our truck was pretty "serious business" looking, but he sized us up and down real quick like, said "it's not your first rodeo, is it?" gave us our crap and waved us through without even really having to stop. pretty awesome!


my guess is a good greeter knows when to do the full song and dance, and when to tip the hat and wave folks through.
User avatar
robrob
 
Posts: 228
Joined: Wed May 05, 2010 4:31 pm
Location: chicago, il
Burning Since: 2010
Camp Name: smoregasm / endor

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby Minxy » Mon Sep 12, 2011 5:26 pm

I support this idea, too.

When I've Greeted, most of my fellow Greeters do evaluate each group and try to treat them accordingly. Problem is, when you get stuck behind a car full of virgins that want to do the bell/playa angel/photo op routine and you just need your WWW and to pass on through.

I personally try to ascertain what each car needs and interact accordingly. If they aren't new, know where they are going, and don't stop and leap out for a hug, then I just give a big welcoming smile, welcome them home, wish them a great burn, warn them about the LEO presence/stick to 5mph speech and hand them their WWW. Most groups fall into typical categories.

The vehicle full of virgins who want the whole virgin routine.
The vehicle of mixed vets and virgins where the vets insist that their virgin friends get out, get hazed and have their humiliation recorded for teh internet.
The vets who are on a mission to get to their camp and don't want a fucking hug, tyvm.
The vets who are on a mission to get to camp but park their car and get out, give me a hug and thank me for Greeting.
People who are returning after a trip out, usually EAP folks. Often they may have not received a WWW during their early arrival so they need that and roll on through.
All of the above mixed types of groups who also need directions or other information.
"If I moop your head, I shall be very displeased." - Savannah
User avatar
Minxy
 
Posts: 850
Joined: Tue Sep 09, 2008 8:10 am
Location: Vallejo, CA

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby junglesmacks » Mon Sep 12, 2011 5:29 pm

It's the 11th principle, didn't you know?







"Radical self-entitlement"







































Get in line, shut up, deal with it.
Savannah wrote:It sounds freaky & wrong, so you need to do it.
User avatar
junglesmacks
 
Posts: 5812
Joined: Wed May 26, 2010 9:54 pm
Location: Your mom's tent
Burning Since: I'm not sure

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby Sic Pup » Mon Sep 12, 2011 5:39 pm

For christsakes it's BM, deal with it. If a 5-6 hour wait in or out is the worst thing that happens to you consider yourself blessed.

I was greeted by some naked dude, he wanted to confiscate whatever substances I had, I asked him if that was their deal were there any more openings for Greeters. There was a couple of virgins in front of me. I sat. Another dude came along and asked if I was greeted and we had a brief discussion about what I intended to do at BM. We discussed some of the art installations. He left. Finally the car in front moved. I began to move and out of the blue a young lady comes zooming in out of the dust yelling at me asking where do I think I'm going without being greeted. I told her I was already greeted twice but if she'd like a go at me I was game, we hugged and she welcomed me home.

Disorganized? Hell, yeah. Systematic? Fuck, no. Charming? Without doubt.

As much as I've insulated myself IRL, there's more than enough regimentation without adding more, thank you very much.
"Enjoy every sandwich" - W. Zevon
User avatar
Sic Pup
 
Posts: 1405
Joined: Tue Aug 10, 2010 9:51 am
Location: Location, Location

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby percussivepaul » Mon Sep 12, 2011 5:53 pm

I don't know, "deal with it" doesn't seem like a constructive attitude. We used to have to deal with brutal exodus lines, now we have pulsed exodus lines which are way more tolerable. I'll suck it up if I have to -- if there really are no alternatives -- but I'm not convinced this is the only way things could be at the greeter station, or that this is the best way they could be.
percussivepaul
 
Posts: 106
Joined: Sat Jul 03, 2010 3:58 pm

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby Drawingablank » Mon Sep 12, 2011 6:05 pm

Granted this was my first burn, but quite frankly the line in and out are both part of the BM experience. Sure its long and that sucks, but you are in line with some of the most awesome folks on earth - I personally wouldn't change anything.
Savannah: I don't know what it is, but no thread here escapes alive. You'll get 1 or 2 real answers at minimum, occasionally 10 or 12, and then we flog it until it's unrecognizable and you can't get your deposit back.

Yet Another Crappy Birgin Guide
User avatar
Drawingablank
 
Posts: 2360
Joined: Thu Mar 31, 2011 8:46 pm
Location: NY
Camp Name: Barbie Death Camp

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby Savannah » Mon Sep 12, 2011 6:34 pm

Minxy wrote:I support this idea, too.

When I've Greeted, most of my fellow Greeters do evaluate each group and try to treat them accordingly. Problem is, when you get stuck behind a car full of virgins that want to do the bell/playa angel/photo op routine and you just need your WWW and to pass on through.

I personally try to ascertain what each car needs and interact accordingly. If they aren't new, know where they are going, and don't stop and leap out for a hug, then I just give a big welcoming smile, welcome them home, wish them a great burn, warn them about the LEO presence/stick to 5mph speech and hand them their WWW. Most groups fall into typical categories.

The vehicle full of virgins who want the whole virgin routine.
The vehicle of mixed vets and virgins where the vets insist that their virgin friends get out, get hazed and have their humiliation recorded for teh internet.
The vets who are on a mission to get to their camp and don't want a fucking hug, tyvm.
The vets who are on a mission to get to camp but park their car and get out, give me a hug and thank me for Greeting.
People who are returning after a trip out, usually EAP folks. Often they may have not received a WWW during their early arrival so they need that and roll on through.
All of the above mixed types of groups who also need directions or other information.


I do this too--I tailor my greeting.

If someone is not in the mood to be Greeted, they may stay in the car, look friendly, collect any timely warnings (as the Greeters often have updates on unusual or breaking news) and collect the map and accessories. And off you go. 60 seconds. Maybe 90.

NB: You're not going to be arrested if you totally blow off Greeters (as opposed to Gate. :lol: ). You just won't get a map/booklet/sticker.
User avatar
Savannah
Moderator
 
Posts: 11441
Joined: Mon Sep 01, 2008 8:33 pm
Burning Since: I'm not sure

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby junglesmacks » Mon Sep 12, 2011 8:59 pm

Maybe we could just consolidate all the exodus/entry/greeter "I've got playa dust in my vag from the 5 hours wait" whiners together? You guys can go dream of rail service straight to BRC, express lanes, carload passes and whatever else floats your boat while crying together about how dreaaaaaaaadful and disorganized TTITD is. Maybe.. you could even cry together while watching in from home next year on the laptop? No gate lines or exodus delays! Imagine!

percussivepaul wrote:I don't know, "deal with it" doesn't seem like a constructive attitude. We used to have to deal with brutal exodus lines, now we have pulsed exodus lines which are way more tolerable. I'll suck it up if I have to -- if there really are no alternatives -- but I'm not convinced this is the only way things could be at the greeter station, or that this is the best way they could be.



Sigh.. I just can't resist. It just..amazes me.. to no end... :D
Savannah wrote:It sounds freaky & wrong, so you need to do it.
User avatar
junglesmacks
 
Posts: 5812
Joined: Wed May 26, 2010 9:54 pm
Location: Your mom's tent
Burning Since: I'm not sure

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby CapSmashy » Mon Sep 12, 2011 9:47 pm

junglesmacks wrote:Maybe we could just consolidate all the exodus/entry/greeter "I've got playa dust in my vag from the 5 hours wait" whiners together? You guys can go dream of rail service straight to BRC, express lanes, carload passes and whatever else floats your boat while crying together about how dreaaaaaaaadful and disorganized TTITD is. Maybe.. you could even cry together while watching in from home next year on the laptop? No gate lines or exodus delays! Imagine!


Image

The point....





Your head....
Playawaste Raiders cordially invites you to suck it.
User avatar
CapSmashy
 
Posts: 1919
Joined: Thu Sep 28, 2006 12:29 pm
Location: Awesome Camp 2.0
Burning Since: 2007
Camp Name: Terminal City://404 Village Not Found

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby junglesmacks » Mon Sep 12, 2011 9:50 pm

Thank you thank you, I'll be here all week. No applause, just throw money.

CapSmashy wrote:The point....
Savannah wrote:It sounds freaky & wrong, so you need to do it.
User avatar
junglesmacks
 
Posts: 5812
Joined: Wed May 26, 2010 9:54 pm
Location: Your mom's tent
Burning Since: I'm not sure

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby bradtem » Mon Sep 12, 2011 10:06 pm

A few years ago I remember they had just this, some lines marked "established theme camps" and I guess others or something like that. Maybe it was just during the early arrival phase? If you went through established theme camp you got a short greeting, unless you were first for your camp. Has this stopped?

It is always fun to be greeted, a great ritual, but I agree it's not so much fun that longtime burners want to wait in line for an hour to do it. They will be greeted heartily when they get to their camp. If the wait is long, I think everybody is happier if you can pick up your WWW from gate or an express-greeter line. Many of us come to the playa with a lot to do when we get there -- setting up art, camps etc. -- and we're running late. It's a shame to be in a hurry in a place like the playa, but for those who are doing lots of stuff it's a fact of life.
See giant panoramas of BRC: http://www.templetons.com/brad/burn
User avatar
bradtem
 
Posts: 462
Joined: Fri Sep 05, 2003 12:27 pm
Location: Silicon Valley
Burning Since: 1998

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby bigbluedoggy » Mon Sep 12, 2011 10:08 pm

Can't help you if you get behind the 3 cars of virgin friends all needing a roll in the dust and a dingdong, but I'm one of those Greeters who makes a pretty quick judgement call on what folks are willing to endure or need from us. Many experienced folks were whisked thru my line in under 60 seconds once I got to them. Just please be friendly about it!
Don't go complicating my reality with facts.

Destiny Lounge Returns for 2015 at Ballyhoo and 3:45! Are you ready for... The Vortex of Destiny?!?!
User avatar
bigbluedoggy
 
Posts: 1445
Joined: Wed Jun 20, 2007 1:25 am
Location: Pasadena / Joshua Tree, CA
Burning Since: 2006
Camp Name: Destiny Lounge

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby ibdave » Mon Sep 12, 2011 10:17 pm

bigbluedoggy wrote:Can't help you if you get behind the 3 cars of virgin friends all needing a roll in the dust and a dingdong, but I'm one of those Greeters who makes a pretty quick judgement call on what folks are willing to endure or need from us. Many experienced folks were whisked thru my line in under 60 seconds once I got to them. Just please be friendly about it!



what he said... 8) 8)
I was Born OK the 1st Time....

Don't bring defaultia to Burning Man, take Burning Man to defaultia...... graidawg
User avatar
ibdave
 
Posts: 3524
Joined: Mon Sep 01, 2003 4:09 pm
Burning Since: 1998

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby oneeyeddick » Mon Sep 12, 2011 10:51 pm

The greeter gate is real easy to just drive around if you don't wanna go through it.
We have an obligation to make space for everyone, we have no obligation to make that space pleasant.
User avatar
oneeyeddick
 
Posts: 5589
Joined: Wed Oct 24, 2007 6:08 pm
Location: Probably in your pants
Burning Since: 1996

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby Savannah » Mon Sep 12, 2011 10:58 pm

Seriously . . . there are over a dozen Greeter lanes, maybe 15 or 20. No one comes after you if you do a polite slow roll through an unmanned lane.

Now: Gate, which precedes, is the closely patrolled area for surrendering tickets, being searched, & being sexually harassed by slim young men who want to pat your smokes.
User avatar
Savannah
Moderator
 
Posts: 11441
Joined: Mon Sep 01, 2008 8:33 pm
Burning Since: I'm not sure

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby graidawg » Mon Sep 12, 2011 11:12 pm

I'm far to new at all this to have a valid opinion, but surely even the most jaded of burners wants to hear "welcome home". Its a once a year thing and how could you possibly want to miss out on the start? for me it was a wonderful experience getting masses and masses of hugs - some greeteres from a different gate even came over to hgu Mdf adn me. In fact I may well claim to be a virgin next year to get extra hugs, though i will confess prior to ringing the bell in the hope of getting some sexual harrassment by people looking for my smokes.
FREE THE SHERPAS
Burners with torches is right and natural and just.-fishy.
CATCH AND RELEASE.
User avatar
graidawg
 
Posts: 3113
Joined: Thu Jan 20, 2011 6:50 am
Burning Since: 2011
Camp Name: Dread Pirate barbie

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby Savannah » Mon Sep 12, 2011 11:16 pm

You don't have to be a virgin to get hugs! You just have to look receptive and/or open your arms. :)
User avatar
Savannah
Moderator
 
Posts: 11441
Joined: Mon Sep 01, 2008 8:33 pm
Burning Since: I'm not sure

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby oneeyeddick » Mon Sep 12, 2011 11:18 pm

I haven't heard welcome home for over 7 years now, except when my imaginary parrot says it when I actually return home.

Gosh I love that parrot.
We have an obligation to make space for everyone, we have no obligation to make that space pleasant.
User avatar
oneeyeddick
 
Posts: 5589
Joined: Wed Oct 24, 2007 6:08 pm
Location: Probably in your pants
Burning Since: 1996

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby Ano » Tue Sep 13, 2011 2:03 am

My greeter my first year was terrible. I was really excited to roll in the dust, get my hug, WWW, etc - and when I pulled up to the gate, I had a disgruntled British guy who was like "fuck, another first timer, okay, okay, we don't have time. just touch the dust, there's the bell, here's your shit." I asked about my Playa angel, he said too bad, there's a big line, and rushed me on my way.

It was kind of sad. I really hope that doesn't happen again.
Ano
 
Posts: 414
Joined: Mon Aug 22, 2011 10:04 pm
Burning Since: 2011
Camp Name: Everlasting Fuck-you's

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby FIGJAM » Tue Sep 13, 2011 6:56 am

I seem to remember the lane on the far left was just a drive through lane.

As little as I looked at the WWW during the event, I think just asking people where they are going and then going there would provide some great adventures. 8)
"Don't buy ur Burn...........Build ur Burn!"

"If I can't find an answer, I'll create one!!!"

Fuck Im Good Just Ask Me
User avatar
FIGJAM
 
Posts: 8905
Joined: Thu Mar 25, 2010 10:39 am
Location: apache junction az.

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby bradtem » Tue Sep 13, 2011 10:27 am

Do people read WWW during the event? I always figured it was for reading after, to recall the cool things that were going on?

When they do a nice android app that lets you see what's going on now (without checking 5 different sections to see all the potential repeating events as well as the one times) that will be cool. I head the iphone app might have done that. Or a pre-planner that lets you select items of interest and it builds an ical file.
See giant panoramas of BRC: http://www.templetons.com/brad/burn
User avatar
bradtem
 
Posts: 462
Joined: Fri Sep 05, 2003 12:27 pm
Location: Silicon Valley
Burning Since: 1998

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby Bexx » Tue Sep 13, 2011 9:49 pm

Aaah I like stopping @ the greeters and saying hi and getting hugs!!!
fuckshit-tit-balls-goddamn motherfucker../Little Miss Swears A Lot!
User avatar
Bexx
 
Posts: 208
Joined: Thu Jul 01, 2010 10:14 pm
Location: Long Beach
Burning Since: 2010
Camp Name: Camp _____ (cock and balls)

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby RedHeaven » Tue Sep 13, 2011 9:54 pm

Fuck apps....I want my bookie! Its the best post Burning Man toilet read material you can get besides a copy of BRC Weekly.
User avatar
RedHeaven
 
Posts: 687
Joined: Fri Sep 09, 2005 11:00 am
Location: Nevada City California
Burning Since: 2005
Camp Name: Cirque Du Cliche

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby Savannah » Tue Sep 13, 2011 9:57 pm

The WWW is one of my favorite souvenirs. I didn't even look inside this year, though normally I read it pretty well of an idle morning while waiting for my caffeine to sink in, circle a dozen things, and eventually try to find . . . one. :)

I really love it, though. It's like a Christmas catalog. A wish book, on the way to what you're really getting . . . which still turns out to be pretty neat. :)
User avatar
Savannah
Moderator
 
Posts: 11441
Joined: Mon Sep 01, 2008 8:33 pm
Burning Since: I'm not sure

Re: An express lane at the greeters

Postby Mojojita » Wed Sep 14, 2011 11:31 am

In many years of greeting, I believe the process has gotten much smoother. I have been constantly amazed at the numbers of veteran greeters return every year to continue to do what I think is the best job on the playa. Lead greeters are always assessing the length of the line (in addition to many other variables) and tell the greeters to switch to "speed greeting" when any serious backup happens. I'm always a little sad for the virgins who don't even get to get out of their cars when that happens but we know that everyone has already been in a long line at Gate. Those people are always welcome to stop by at a quieter time to be well and truly deflowered.
Frankly, there is no "pass through" lane for veterans. The information being gathered and disseminated by greeters may be old hat (although sometimes is new and pertinent) but never stops being important to the success of the event. During early entry, greeters must contact the camp's placer by radio if it is the first to arrive from their theme camp - before the vehicle leaves the greeter's station. This happens more smoothly now as we most often move those cars out of the lanes so others don't get hung up behind them. It is a drag for many who get stuck behind a bus full of newbs who really want the entire 9 yards. I hope you will consider it a bit of unaviodable but truly interactive performance art.
Ut ballista es interdico, tantum interdico mos fui ballista.
User avatar
Mojojita
 
Posts: 1146
Joined: Tue Mar 09, 2010 11:17 am
Location: Under your bed


Return to Experiences at Burning Man

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest

cron