Love of my life and soul mate MYA

Love of my life and soul mate MYA

Postby Dan Snakehead » Tue Sep 11, 2012 9:17 am

Was proposed to by the guy that I had to rescue her from in the first place. Stole my idea that I confided in him on how to propose last year (in the ashes of the temple to symbolize rising a new from the flames, pheonix love). I have till late spring 2013 before it's too late. Blindingly good looks are what I'm up against but I'm armed with a pure heart and infinite love. Please her her see the truth and find her way to me oh dust gods and playa faeries...with out her Ill just wither...


The Dire Wolf


With out you, every moment is hell
with you, even seconds are lifetimes
The lost darkness of having been in and now out of you and your life
you feel it too, you feel me I know you do…we share it though mutual denial
you are scared of me and with good reason

With out you every moment is hell
this wolf is yours, but you know not what to do with him
Forced, from your loving captivity
kicking, biting, screaming and barking
thrown from a home never had
left with dreams of possible return
reserve a space for the comfort of the dog of constant sorrow

Without you every moment is hell
you are the oasis of my existence
I am prepared to expire in thirst
Clothed in guilt from wanting more
hungry for your quenching light
and to see you hunger once again for what we shared

with out you, every moment is hell
we are terrified as to what we can still do together
as much I, with what will happen to me with out you
haunted with concern you continue with out fleeting thought
and are embraced as such by your peers
a part of you won't let this happen
we are connected in that way
I am forever your mistake

With out you, hell begins
there is such a thing as praying to much
be careful what I wish for
I thought I would evolve before the clock struck
My surroundings were underestimated
It was assumed all that was needed, was to love you more than anything
It was expected to permeate, and with consent aloud, it to consume all that surround me

With out you hell grows
before we met and now
You were and are prayed for and pictured not always by choice
My heart held for only you
Too late to be without programmed jealousy
The wall that prevents me from sharing of hearts
Has height equal to our connection
Yet it grows higher with each moment of separation
like ripping stitches
a juxtaposed paradox of confusion
how can I feel so sure of what seems to be,
an impossibility?

With out you, hell accends
To your guidance, I am open
you make me so vulnerable yet keep me safe
you protect me like no other, yet are the source of my pain
Confusion insues over my black and white ideals of which role to play
The complexities of grey terminology conflict a primal heart
Oh to be taught to accept that which I am coated with
The grey fur which I can not see

with out you, hell is born
with out intention you reaffirm
with you, I am home
why must I feel fucking…fucking, so fucking alone?

With out you, hell awakens
you will live with the balance of peace and adventure with out me
you deserve to, yet perfection is a life with out challenge
the pursuit out weighs the reward
not obstacle, but real challenge
some thing to be undeniably crowned beyond all shadow of a doubt
a rightcheous accomplishment of evocation

With out you, hell thrives
I am summoned, truly summoned by you regardless of your conscious
How can I trust your mask of dismissal
When I have seen the content of the love you have…
How can expectation of freedom from the desire of your love exist
You have had many volunteers and will continue to
but none with my passion to succeed, none with my potential

With out you, hell is immortal
I am a nettle with dreams of bloom and you are the only water
I can consume.
I am not a perennial I am an enigma without fuel
I will and have sting all those around me with out intention
simply of fear I mount defences that are often mistaken as aggression
I want to be your tiger lily
I want I want I want, I I I, me me me

With out you, hell is crowned.
Heaven is waiting by the window knowing you'll come back
scratch my fears, rub my soul, pet my ego, throw your comfort for a bone
A chew toy in place of mind and body
That which breeds guilt like steak

I have become hell and the only light I can see is yours…
Now, with two simple words
you intend to close the door to the hell of which you are the only escape
as the last shards of light seep from my soul
I return to the eternal cage from whence I came

How do I give you my blessing while begging you not to go through with it…?
I want you to be happy. I really do.
My eyes burst with the notion of never being your husband every time you pass through
My mind, reels at the impending apocalypse
My heart rushes with panic, please don't let this be real, repeats over and over

Take me away from this reality
Everything is going wrong
Father and son, with no holy ghost to guide them
Lost in confusion, a black & white world of lies
You a brilliant tapestry mapping my senses
Showing me how to see
the only refuge from a life of torture and abuse

The demons that live in me are only shaken by you
With you they tremble, I felt so close to freedom
the loosening grip giving my first real breath of not life but living
after a timeless isolation
I am born from you and can not return like a new baby being told to wait to breath

Hell is now inside me
The human body with its fail safes, loss of conscious, even death
do not apply. Hell is a pain with out end from which there is no escape or sanctuary
Ready to return, though death was expected prior
The bowels and maggots should fear the overload yet the saliva drips in anticipation
for the succulent taste of a pain as bitter sweet as this

Hell awaits me, the main course
What a magnificent feast it will be
enough pain to feed the demon armies
to nurture them, fuel them, give them what they want
they will grow stronger until they break the chains that bind
returning to the sites and people from which this pain was created
armed with senses of wolves now seeking more, endless hunger,
we could have ended the need for suffering
now instead they will be fed, a moment of satiation
reinstalling the motivation to feed.

Hell is ready for you and yours
we all share in this pain
for hell can see you now
your angels are gone, you are naked
oblivious to what can see you
the evil joy of how to hurt you next is channeled with out me now

Hell is watching, sharpening her claws
i am a forgotten utensil, purpose served
good wolf, bad dog
tar where there once was blood
spikes for hair, blood for sweat, rust for bones, and fear for eyes
dripping heart blood with a faceless expression
A cardboard soul, only teeth, no lips
Brimstone for skin and rotten breath

Hell is smiling
quiet and patient, preparing so carefully
meticulous planning, twisted calculation
unfathomable caniving, a dark opus destined for fruition
with out me, you aren't safe, I can not guard you from the evils waiting for you in the afterlife
If you betroth another
The rabbit you hold so dear will be forced to watch you die again and again
None can protect you there but me.

I know the rules of the place called hell and
we are all going there…
You made the easier choice for this fleeting temporary
hiccup that is the span of mortal life, though…
the impact of that choice will haunt you for all eternity
It is my failure and destiny to watch you endure the pain
an all to familiar sight, one i was willing to inflict for the chance to protect from unending sorrow
i am so sorry I have failed you my love.

Hell arrives late spring 2013...
Dan Snakehead = Dance Naked the most clever name in Djing 13 years exp. available for 1 or 2 more stage performances, Representing DJ's in a Box, Victoria BC Canada. I play EVERYTHING and LOVE being challenged with genres and improvised fusion.
Dan Snakehead
 
Posts: 11
Joined: Tue Apr 12, 2011 10:35 am
Location: Salt Spring Island, British Columbia, Canada.
Burning Since: 2011

Re: Love of my life and soul mate MYA

Postby Dan Snakehead » Tue Sep 11, 2012 9:21 am

AKA Fable Quin
Dan Snakehead = Dance Naked the most clever name in Djing 13 years exp. available for 1 or 2 more stage performances, Representing DJ's in a Box, Victoria BC Canada. I play EVERYTHING and LOVE being challenged with genres and improvised fusion.
Dan Snakehead
 
Posts: 11
Joined: Tue Apr 12, 2011 10:35 am
Location: Salt Spring Island, British Columbia, Canada.
Burning Since: 2011


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