The test for all those honorary dykes:
1) What is your biological gender?
2) What is your perceived gender?
3) What is your kind of underwear are you wearing right now?
4) What does that penis-shaped thing in your house run on?
5) True or false - beauty is pain?
True. Waxing. Plucking. Peel-off facemasks. Massaging thighs with a knobbly anti-cellutite thingy. Fuck yes.
False. Clear pores. Unplucked brows. Soft sweet pit hair. True beauty transcends artifice.
6) What do you think of the Women's World Cup?
a)It's ludicrous. They run like girls!
b)Umâ€¦they look like geezers.
c)It's good to see females empowering themselves by participating in traditionally male-dominated competitive sports.
d)It fucking rocks
7) Do you have a cat?
Do you have a large breed dog?
9) When you see a womans breasts, you:
a)Look away quickly
b)No big deal
d)Imagine your lips puckering around the pale pink areole, feeling it stiffen beneath your tongue; a sweet sigh of pleasure slipping from her lips as you slide your hand down her bodyâ€¦
e)All of the above.
9) When you first started having sex with boys, did you think:
a)Big fucking deal
d)You can have sex with boys?
10 What's your fave thing about most of the men in your life?
It's those Swedes again....get the hose.