by theCryptofishist » Mon May 14, 2012 8:00 pm
If we learned anything this year (and some would say we haven't) it's that you can't count on anything at burningman. Not even the sanctity of your ticket or your theme camp. That is why we at Camp Research Center are debuting our first concept camp: Emergency Polka Camp.
Yes, in a Burningman Environment where all sorts of things--break-ups, llc intransigence, bad dust storms, blm population caps, rival theme camp dirty trick squads, warehouse fires, food poisoning, currency devaluation, school schedules, ufo abduction--can result in drastic changes to your theme camp, it's good to know that you have a back up. With up to two weeks' notification before gate opens, you can be ready to have a Polka Theme Camp that will kick ass and leave other camps in your dust!
How does this amazing system work? Easy. We have everything ready for you to go, staged in a warehouse in Sparks. For a low annual fee you can rest easy that the theme camp basics are ready at the drop of a stetson, waiting for you to apply the finishing touches. When you activate your option, things start to roll. On opening day a truck rolls in with everything you need for your camp and unloads on a likely piece of playa.
This offer includes: Shade Structures (Public and Private); Kitchen; Costumes--including those all important crinolines; Sound System; Dance Floor; Accordions; Polka Instructor; and an Extensive Library of Polka Hits and Classics. Think of a few theme nights, or rely on our suggestions, and sit back to enjoy your hottest theme camp ever! Think you can't afford the Emergency Polka Theme Camp: Just Add Dust? The truth is, you can't afford not to have it. Keeping your options open is the key to a good burn, and nothing keeps your options open like the Emergency Polka Theme Camp!
Lose your legs--Become a merit badge.
Remember, you're just a make-believe soldier in an artificial army.