"Best" I don't know. there's people on this board who've been asking where to give them, so they might be anywhere.
The most likely answer you'll get is HeeBeeGeeBee healers, who've been out there longer than I have. (the last century, I think.)
Get to know people and ask "do you knwo where I can get a massage?" I'm sure you'll find something.
BTW, asking for a "happy ending" is just tacky.
Lose your legs--Become a merit badge.
Remember, you're just a make-believe soldier in an artificial army.