"Pool Boy" or "Pool Girl" Needed for BM

[Bigfinger]

We are seeking an expert pool attendant to setup and maintain our 4 ft deep, 15 ft diameter PRIVATE camp swimming pool. You may have heard myth of our epic pool parties. Well, this is your chance to get in on the most fun you’ve had with water in a long time. And when a dust storm comes and we pull the pool cover over our heads…you will cry with glee as your laughter echoes inside the pool tent.

Qualifications of this most esteemed Pool Guard are the following:

1) Strong operational knowledge of Diatomaceous Earth Filter/Pump Systems
2) Deep mixing knowledge of the necessary ORGANIC additives and how to achieve the right pH balance
3) Must look sexy with a zinc-covered nose and speedo/bikini

If you fit the specs and are looking for a damn good rockin’ time with the sexiest freaks on the playa, then please contact me ASAP so we can get you acquainted with our pool system. If this isn’t exactly your bag, then please pass this on to anyone you deem qualified for the job. Thanks!

[falk]

Please don't spam, it's very rude.

[headquarters]

yay for super 3<33+ PRIVATE camps!!!

[Kinetic IV]

Oooh! It's private! We're going to haul all this stuff out there so we can be elitist snobs and do our thing and restrict it from everyone but our little clique. So much for building a community or interacting with others. We'll just sit in our oversized kiddie pool and be spectators.

Ok it's a bit overboard but it's got a wrongness factor attached that can't be ignored either.

Hmmm...rough math. (and I suck at math but this should be in the ballpark)
pi x radius squared x depth = volume in cubic feet.
volume in cubic feet x 7.5 = approx 707 gallons to fill this thing using the numbers they provided. Now factor in evaporation and the replacement needed and that's a lot of water...which has to be hauled in. It's interesting to think about. And where does that water end up after the event...the filters are not perfect and with all those chemicals...hmmm. I betcha it doesn't get hauled out like many of us would do if we had leftover water...in particular grey water which this would technically qualify as.

It's time to raise that wrongness factor IMHO. Or for someone to correct some faulty logic of mine.

[DNAinVEGAS]

I agree with you 100% Kinetic. This has to be a joke, because nobody would be this rediculas. LOL!

If true, I too wonder how they are going to haul all that water away. I KNOW they are not going to be stupid enough to dump it on the Playa!

[Sobretta Franjipan]

Um, nope haven't heard of these "epic" pool parties.

And pools are gross on the playa.

So you all happen to be in the pool when the dust storm comes? And you pull the handy cover over? Sounds like the most miserable place to be in a storm. Certainly dust will get in and create a nice, gritty, soupy muck. The air is thick and there is no ventilation. But it will all be over soon and then it's time for the "expert" pool attendant to get out his big water gun and squirt everyone down. "Whoo hoo! Mucky wet t-shirt party bro!" Then you all collapse in mirth while the expert chef you've hired for the week prepares supper. Some food, some gin and tonics, a goodnight to all at your PRIVATE camp-why really bother to go out into that PUBLIC world?

Do the "sexiest freaks on the playa" (ha hahahahahahahahahaha-really, that's good) have the top international DJ's spinning by their PRIVATE pool?

Belly up! This smacks of swiiiiiiingersssss heyyyyoooooohhh

[buckethead alien]

Hey, Tommy can swing with the big leaguers, so I wouldn't put it past him to pull this one off, ba-by. I, for one, am sending in my 8X10 glossies. Not that I know jackall about pool chemistry, but I do look good in Speedos, if I do say so myself.

[Steven bradford]

do look good in speedos

Yes but how many speedos does it take for you to look good in them?!!

[theCryptofishist]

I Still think Hollywood is the operative word.


That and crossposting...

[theCryptofishist]

Oh dear god. I just got pm'd by the op complaining that I'm niavely stereotyping him. Okay dude. I find the idea that you have a PRIVATE pool and wish to have someone attractive service it ON PLAYA offensive. I'm not going to say that there isn't a social hierarchy at BM, but it's flatter than it is in the default world. I see this as bringing in class hierarchies that I don't want to see there. I see it as claiming a priveledge that diminishes "radical self-reliance." And yes, the only pool boys we see in Berkeley tend to be those on "Desparate Housewives" a very hollywood creation.

Yeah, I know, not supposed to post contents of pms. I take the stand that as it was unsolicited that I don't have to honor that--whereas if I had originated contact or it was a reply to a reply I would have felt the rules applied.

So, did anyone else here from bigfinger?

[buckethead alien]

Hollywood? Hi fishie!

[Chai Guy]

Reason #237 why I left L.A. for San Francisco.

[Buster Friendly]

Jesus Tap-Dancing Christ, Tommy. I hope you're not planning on putting this in Fandango Village. We get enough hepatitis scares from the bar, who knows what's going to be breeding in that giant petri dish of yours.

[theCryptofishist]

Hollywood? Hi fishie!

Point of origen in op's profile.

Hi Bucket!!!

[theCryptofishist]

Jesus Tap-Dancing Christ, Tommy. I hope you're not planning on putting this in Fandango Village. We get enough hepatitis scares from the bar, who knows what's going to be breeding in that giant petri dish of yours.

Careful. word is that rex will be on hand to save it.

[ZaphodBurner]

I just hope those folks who build exclusive, private camps have the juevos to identify themselves as such so I can kick them out of our public camp.

You don't want people in your camp, stay the fuck out of theirs.

I think an excellent idea for the BMORG would be to simply establish a fraternity row. I mean other than the latrines.

-c

[AntiM]

Fraternity Row! How excellent! Animal House Camp! Woohoo! Wait, no, they were independents, hm? Toga! Toga!

I swear, I did see AH in a theater while attending the U of U. Yes, my GPA that quarter was 0.0, although I never booted on the dean.

The "euww" factor of a pool slave has my little head dancing with visions of sneaking into the private pool area and adding a tummyful of colorful chum to the waters. Or at least a Baby Ruth bar. Perhaps that would lead to a slave rebellion, torches and whips and such. Oooooooh!

[Kinetic IV]

The Baby Ruth idea is hilarious. I'll bring some just in case, it's too good of an idea to ignore. And I'd gladly donate them to such a worthy cause!!!

[Steven bradford]

Real world not sufficiently judgemental for you?

Come to burning man, and do something different!

Or, hang out only in the radical free conformist camps.

[blyslv]

""Belly up! This smacks of swiiiiiiingersssss heyyyyoooooohhh""

Hooray Sobreta Franjipan is back. What a lurvely!

[theCryptofishist]

Real world not sufficiently judgemental for you?

Come to burning man, and do something different!

Or, hang out only in the radical free conformist camps.

Yeah, there's something about indentured servitude that irks me.


Maybe I hate freedom.

[landra_lee]

Wow, I would not expect such brashness from a group of people that i usually enjoy reading posts from...

First of all, the CAMP is not private at all. And nobody here is trying to be an "elitist". If you have never been to one of Tommy and Tomas' pool parties, then you don't know how fun and spontaneous they can be... and these guys are ANYTHING but spectators. Two art cars, 24-hour full bar, radically inclusive to say the least... I mean, I met them both 2 years ago on the playa, and have felt like family ever since, even though I haven't officially camped with them before. If you guys don't know Tommy and Tomas, then you don't know how much of a joy it can be just being near them, and how supportive they are of their neighbors and other LA-based camps, and how into collaboration they are. Or the fact that last year they invited about 10-15 people they had never met before to join the camp, including some japanese kids that didn't even hardly speak english, and my friend Susanne and her son, who they had never met but were still hospitable, and the amount of work they put in every year to make the camp highly interactive and inviting.

As for the Private status of the pool, can you really blame? If they have arranged with the water truck people, have a solution to the grey water, and use ORGANIC water treatment... which is the case, even though nobody here knows... then what is the problem? The pool only fits so many people... and they did go to the trouble to bring it out... and it isn't like you need a VIP pass... they just don't want it to get muddy, or pissed in by a thousand people, or any number of things that could come up if it were just unsupervised... which is why the ad for the pool boy/girl... it is alot of work to keep it nice!! And everyone pitches in!!

I think that maybe instead of ranting without knowledge of the facts, that a positive outlook and focus on the whole point of the post would be better than e-bashing. Sorry, but thats my two cents.

[landra_lee]

Oh, and this wonderful idea of vomitting in the pool intentionally...

How very kind of you.

Sabotaging other's property is what this is all about right? Awesome.

This thread has completely diverted, and to be honest, it makes me kind of sad that such hateful words are coming from burners... especially towards a fellow one who is so generous and fun to be around.

[theCryptofishist]

None of that generosity comes across in the original post. PLus

Has anyone ever heard of anyone who arrived on a "work visa" and then had to abandon their camp because of the conditions. Really, I can imagine it going wrong more for the sponsor than the employee (someone shows up, you get them in, they stay with you for a few days then disappear to a cooler camp where they've made friends or, even worse, already have friends).

I've heard the stories. I've dealt with the stories. None have been pretty. NONE of them. And yes, it seems like the majority of these trade-for-work situations were exploitive. Sort of a mild form of hostage taking. Id suggest people stay the hell away from such offers.

It's a receipe for disaster on both sides. You also have to wonder what happened to the original person they had set up for this gig (and if they're just now getting around to finding a maid. pool boy, chef you have to wonder how much planning they've put into their other projects).

It really does raise some questions about exploitation--at least to some of us. Why don't you act as pool girl if this is such a hot offer? And the cross-posting made him look pretty effin clueless too.

[landra_lee]

I would gladly offer my services if I knew anything at all about pools, other than the fact that they are great for drinking beer in. And these boys are not indentured slave drivers, nor trying to expolit anyone. I think this was a general post to see if anyone out there had knowledge of an operating system and would like to do check ups to make sure everything keeps running smoothly. I don't think *anyone* would ask another person to stay stationary on the playa. Is that even possible?

[theCryptofishist]

Okay, Landra, sorry to have insulted your friends. Try to keep in mind that every year we seem to get some "Looking for a hot young chick to share my RV--I'll provide ticket" posts that just reek of dirty hippy old man trying to get some. I don't actually think this cannot under any circumstances work, but I've been through wierd situations--traveling dog sitter, unpaid house sitter--to knwo that if expectations are communicated clearly from the get go, things get ugly. Thank goodness it's never happened with a sexual content.

[AntiM]

eye roll It was sarcasm, Landra, sarcasm. Like I actually would blow chunks in a pool on purpose.

Okay, so maybe these are rockin' dudes, but I still didn't like the feel or sound of the original post. I can see that with a full bar and two art cars they're busy, busy men, but if their pool is so fantastic, why can't they (or all campmates) take care of it themselves? And if they don't know anyone who is qualified, why hit the eplaya so late in the game? Is the pool that spectacular that it must be part of the camp? Advertising for an attendant for what amounts to a private pool party on the eplaya, especially repeatedly in all forums, is snarky IMHO. That's my opinion, feel free to ignore it, but there you have it, my two cents.

I wasn't being hateful, just mocking a poorly presented idea. Read it out of context as it was presented to us, and you may see why the post ruffled feathers. We're a crusty bunch here, so relax, read everything with a grain of salt and remember: It is Just A Fucking, Bulletin, Board and e-bashing is an Olympic sport!

[ZaphodBurner]

Wow, I would not expect such brashness from a group of people that i usually enjoy reading posts from...

First of all, the CAMP is not private at all. And nobody here is trying to be an "elitist". If you have never been to one of Tommy and Tomas' pool parties, then you don't know how fun and spontaneous they can be.

Well, given that the OP expressly stated that the pool was PRIVATE, what are we to expect? How would we know how fun and spontaneous they can be if it's private?

We have private stuff in our camp, too, but here's the deal: We don't brag to people about it and then remind them that it's PRIVATE. If we did, we would expect a variety of responses.

Hopefully then it was just the wording of the post and not the spirit of the particular camp that confused people. [edited in:] I'm glad you came forth to support these folks if they're as cool as you suggest, because it's good to know that there has been a simple miscommunication rather than the playa situation that, clearly, all of the responders interpreted it as.

Peace, and have a spectacular burn!

-c
Zaphod

[Kinetic IV]

If there's a plan for dealing with the chemically laden grey water besides trucking it out to be dumped elsewhere I'm hopeful someone will share it. Having that kind of knowledge available for large scale theme camps would be wonderful.

My other concerns were echoed by others. Anyway have fun with the private pool....which is just another place on the playa that I won't get to check out. Sniff. Sniff.

[stuart]

Landra,

I know and like Tommy. I knew Tomas Verde when he lived across the street from me and referred to himself as Tom Green. He blames me and wife for his first burning man. So, now that we have my bonafides out of the way...

Tommy is very skilled at (cross)posting stuff that really gets peoples back up. I am not sure if it is intentional or not but there certainly is a pattern to be observed.