What's yellow and red and looks great on hippies?
Fire!
Why don't they have a hunting season for hippies?
Have you ever tried to clean one of those fuckers...
your stupid joke here
Re: your stupid joke here
by jorgebongo » Sat Jan 21, 2012 7:59 pm
I do mind, the Dude minds. This will not stand, ya know, this aggression will not stand man.
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Re: your stupid joke here
by theCryptofishist » Sun Feb 26, 2012 9:22 pm
What do you call a woman with no legs?
Dilapidated.
Dilapidated.
Lose your legs--Become a merit badge.
Remember, you're just a make-believe soldier in an artificial army.
Remember, you're just a make-believe soldier in an artificial army.
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theCryptofishist - Posts: 34110
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Re: your stupid joke here
by maryanimal » Sun Feb 26, 2012 9:38 pm
What's the difference between a rooster and a postitute?
A rooster says, Cock a doodle doo!
A prostitute says, Any cock'll do!
A rooster says, Cock a doodle doo!
A prostitute says, Any cock'll do!
Sometimes I'm confused by what I think is really obvious. But what I think is really obvious obviously isn't obvious.
Burning Man is the answer, without the question, wrapped in a Hat.~~Gonzo F
Burning Man is the answer, without the question, wrapped in a Hat.~~Gonzo F
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Re: your stupid joke here
by graidawg » Sat Mar 03, 2012 6:06 pm
why was 6 scared of 7? because 7 8 9
alternative version
why was 6 scared of 7? because 7 is a cunt
alternative version
why was 6 scared of 7? because 7 is a cunt
Bring it bitch! I remain unvanquished
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Re: your stupid joke here
by knowmad » Sun Mar 04, 2012 2:24 am
how do you catch a unique rabbit?
you 'neek' up on it.
how do you catch a tame unique rabbit?
tame way you 'neek' up on it.
you 'neek' up on it.
how do you catch a tame unique rabbit?
tame way you 'neek' up on it.
...................................................
...................................................
I don't need to be a Queen or a King to be a Princess.
...................................................I don't need to be a Queen or a King to be a Princess.
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Re: your stupid joke here
by wh..sh » Mon Mar 05, 2012 8:33 pm
knowmad wrote:how do you catch a unique rabbit?
you 'neek' up on it.
how do you catch a tame unique rabbit?
tame way you 'neek' up on it.
*snickers*
In my world there's only legible and more legible.
-Bob
-Bob
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Re: your stupid joke here
by ygmir » Mon Mar 05, 2012 11:19 pm
wh..sh wrote:knowmad wrote:how do you catch a unique rabbit?
you 'neek' up on it.
how do you catch a tame unique rabbit?
tame way you 'neek' up on it.
*snickers*
YGMIR
Unabashed Nordic
Pagan
Unabashed Nordic
Pagan
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ygmir - Posts: 24112
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Re: your stupid joke here
by knowmad » Tue Mar 06, 2012 1:18 pm
thx YGY! one of my faves!
......................................................................................................
I don't need to be a Queen or a King to be a Princess.
...................................................I don't need to be a Queen or a King to be a Princess.
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knowmad - Posts: 2990
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'12 Barbie Death
Re: your stupid joke here
by theCryptofishist » Fri May 18, 2012 10:17 am
Did you hear about the ventriloquist who was using a sea bird instead of a dummy?
He was talking out of tern.
He was talking out of tern.
Lose your legs--Become a merit badge.
Remember, you're just a make-believe soldier in an artificial army.
Remember, you're just a make-believe soldier in an artificial army.
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theCryptofishist - Posts: 34110
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Re: your stupid joke here
by FIGJAM » Fri May 18, 2012 12:30 pm
My eyes arn't what they use to be.
They used to be my ears!
They used to be my ears!
Don't buy your burn....build your burn!
Fuck Im Good Just Ask Me
Fuck Im Good Just Ask Me
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Re: your stupid joke here
by TomServo » Fri May 18, 2012 12:35 pm
What did the DJ say after the drugs wore off?
"Man, this music sucks!"
"Man, this music sucks!"
anything worth doing..is worth overdoing
Even though were all alone we are never on our own
Even though were all alone we are never on our own
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Re: your stupid joke here
by catinthefunnyhat » Fri May 18, 2012 4:45 pm
What's brown and sticky?
A stick.
A stick.
If you want drama to stop following you everywhere, try letting go of the leash.
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Re: your stupid joke here
by graidawg » Fri May 18, 2012 4:49 pm
whats pink and fluffy?
pink fluff
pink fluff
Bring it bitch! I remain unvanquished
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graidawg - Posts: 2612
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Re: your stupid joke here
by TomServo » Fri May 18, 2012 5:41 pm
Think I posted this before..but oh well..
What do you get from having sex with birds?
Chirpies...
Its a canarial disease that's untweetable.
What do you get from having sex with birds?
Chirpies...
Its a canarial disease that's untweetable.
anything worth doing..is worth overdoing
Even though were all alone we are never on our own
Even though were all alone we are never on our own
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TomServo - Posts: 5687
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Re: your stupid joke here
by FIGJAM » Fri May 18, 2012 6:33 pm
What's green and slimy and smells like bacon?
Kermit the frogs finger!
Kermit the frogs finger!
Don't buy your burn....build your burn!
Fuck Im Good Just Ask Me
Fuck Im Good Just Ask Me
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Re: your stupid joke here
by Thecatman » Fri May 18, 2012 9:05 pm
A blond joke.
A blond and a brunette were watching the evening news
A story about a man planning to jump from the 20th floor of a building had the headlines.
"I'll bet you fifty bucks he jumps" the brunette says to the blond.
"You're on" replys the blond.
It turns out the man jumped.
The blond pays the $50
The brunette says
"I can't take your money. I saw the midday news and I knew he was going to jump".
The blond replys "No, you won it. I saw the midday news too but I didn't think he would jump twice in one day".
A blond and a brunette were watching the evening news
A story about a man planning to jump from the 20th floor of a building had the headlines.
"I'll bet you fifty bucks he jumps" the brunette says to the blond.
"You're on" replys the blond.
It turns out the man jumped.
The blond pays the $50
The brunette says
"I can't take your money. I saw the midday news and I knew he was going to jump".
The blond replys "No, you won it. I saw the midday news too but I didn't think he would jump twice in one day".
My cats are cuter then your grandkids!
"We in Arizona (and the rest of the United States) have been more than patient waiting for Washington to act."
"Government is not the solution to our problems, government is the problem."
"We in Arizona (and the rest of the United States) have been more than patient waiting for Washington to act."
"Government is not the solution to our problems, government is the problem."
- Thecatman
- Posts: 1421
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Re: your stupid joke here
by graidawg » Sat May 19, 2012 9:43 am
4 blondes walk into a bar and the barman asks what they want - 4 shots please they reply the barman serves them and they all say 56! before downing the shot.
unusual toast says the barman, why 56?
well replies one the blondes we just finished a jigsaw, and it took us 56 days but it said for 2 to 5 years on the box
unusual toast says the barman, why 56?
well replies one the blondes we just finished a jigsaw, and it took us 56 days but it said for 2 to 5 years on the box
Bring it bitch! I remain unvanquished
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Re: your stupid joke here
by Onion » Sat May 19, 2012 11:55 am
So, three mice are sitting at a bar, talking about how tough they are.
Mouse 1: I'm so tough, I grab the bar on the mousetraps and bench press that shit.
Mouse 2: Oh yeah, well I crush up poison pellets and snort it like it's cocaine.
Mouse 3 gets up and starts walking away.
Mouse 2: Where ya going? Not tough enough to hang with us?
Mouse 3: Nah, I gotta go home and.....................
fuck the cat!
Mouse 1: I'm so tough, I grab the bar on the mousetraps and bench press that shit.
Mouse 2: Oh yeah, well I crush up poison pellets and snort it like it's cocaine.
Mouse 3 gets up and starts walking away.
Mouse 2: Where ya going? Not tough enough to hang with us?
Mouse 3: Nah, I gotta go home and.....................
fuck the cat!
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Onion - Posts: 51
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Re: your stupid joke here
by ranger magnum » Sat May 19, 2012 9:52 pm
Whats better than winning the gold medal at the special olympics?
Not being retarded
Not being retarded
Its better to be king of your silence than a slave to your words
- ranger magnum
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Re: your stupid joke here
by Gonzo Frothwood » Tue May 22, 2012 5:12 pm
Met a girl in a bar. She asked me to take her home with me. I said I charge a dollar an inch. That will be $2.
She laughed.
And I said...
...the first foot's free.
She laughed.
And I said...
...the first foot's free.
"There is nothing so over-estimated as a piece of ass, and nothing so under-estimated as a good and greasy shit." Boneman Johnson
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Re: your stupid joke here
by Thecatman » Mon May 28, 2012 7:32 pm
Three elderly couples in their early 80s were enjoying afternoon tea together.
One of the elderly gents says to his wife, "Will you please pass me the sugar?
Sugar!"
One of the other gents sees this and says to his wife, "Will you please pass me the honey?
Honey!"
The last gent catches on and says to his wife, "Will you please pass me a tea?
Bag!"
One of the elderly gents says to his wife, "Will you please pass me the sugar?
Sugar!"
One of the other gents sees this and says to his wife, "Will you please pass me the honey?
Honey!"
The last gent catches on and says to his wife, "Will you please pass me a tea?
Bag!"
My cats are cuter then your grandkids!
"We in Arizona (and the rest of the United States) have been more than patient waiting for Washington to act."
"Government is not the solution to our problems, government is the problem."
"We in Arizona (and the rest of the United States) have been more than patient waiting for Washington to act."
"Government is not the solution to our problems, government is the problem."
- Thecatman
- Posts: 1421
- Joined: Mon Apr 16, 2007 8:47 pm
- Location: Nevada desert 120miles S. of BRC
Re: your stupid joke here
by knowmad » Tue May 29, 2012 3:51 pm
A guy walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "Do you have any helicopter flavored potato chips?" The bartender shakes his head and says, "No, we only have plain."
......................................................................................................
I don't need to be a Queen or a King to be a Princess.
...................................................I don't need to be a Queen or a King to be a Princess.
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knowmad - Posts: 2990
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'12 Barbie Death
Re: your stupid joke here
by theCryptofishist » Sun Jul 01, 2012 11:28 pm
What do you call a builder in Dresden?
The Erector of Saxony...
The Erector of Saxony...
Lose your legs--Become a merit badge.
Remember, you're just a make-believe soldier in an artificial army.
Remember, you're just a make-believe soldier in an artificial army.
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theCryptofishist - Posts: 34110
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Re: your stupid joke here
by Sail Man » Mon Jul 09, 2012 7:49 pm
So, one day farmer Lyle and his son Timmy were out in the field when Timmy spied two cows over younder.
"Pa, what are then thar cow's doing"
"Well boy, their mating"
"Huh?" says Timmy
"There screwing, fucking, having sex" says Lyle
"Huh?"
"OK" says Lyle, let me go show you with Ma......so into the farm house they go. "Ma! Drop your drawers and lean over the table....now Timmy, you see that thar hole tween Ma's legs?"
"Yeah" says Timmy
"Well, watch this" and Lyle drops his pants and begins to screw Ma, "This is mating son!" He hollars as he continues thrusting...
And in walks Timmy's sister Tammy.
"Brother Timmy, what are Ma and Pa doing?" she asks.
"There mating" he says.
"Huh?" Tammy replies
"Well", says Timmy, dropping his drawers.
"You see that that hole tween Pa's legs?"
"Pa, what are then thar cow's doing"
"Well boy, their mating"
"Huh?" says Timmy
"There screwing, fucking, having sex" says Lyle
"Huh?"
"OK" says Lyle, let me go show you with Ma......so into the farm house they go. "Ma! Drop your drawers and lean over the table....now Timmy, you see that thar hole tween Ma's legs?"
"Yeah" says Timmy
"Well, watch this" and Lyle drops his pants and begins to screw Ma, "This is mating son!" He hollars as he continues thrusting...
And in walks Timmy's sister Tammy.
"Brother Timmy, what are Ma and Pa doing?" she asks.
"There mating" he says.
"Huh?" Tammy replies
"Well", says Timmy, dropping his drawers.
"You see that that hole tween Pa's legs?"
Excuse me Ma'am, your going to feel a small prick.
_______________________________________
Algorithms never survive the first thirty seconds of patient contact
_______________________________________
Algorithms never survive the first thirty seconds of patient contact
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Re: your stupid joke here
by S.Factor123 » Tue Jul 10, 2012 1:35 am
Not so funny, or not of my type jokes.
Party.
- S.Factor123
- Posts: 5
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Re: your stupid joke here
by knowmad » Tue Jul 10, 2012 3:38 pm
oh SM!
......................................................................................................
I don't need to be a Queen or a King to be a Princess.
...................................................I don't need to be a Queen or a King to be a Princess.
-
knowmad - Posts: 2990
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'12 Barbie Death
Re: your stupid joke here
by theCryptofishist » Tue Jul 10, 2012 4:09 pm
Nice!
Lose your legs--Become a merit badge.
Remember, you're just a make-believe soldier in an artificial army.
Remember, you're just a make-believe soldier in an artificial army.
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theCryptofishist - Posts: 34110
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Re: your stupid joke here
by knowmad » Tue Jul 10, 2012 4:12 pm
theCryptofishist wrote:Nice!
I thought you'd like that Fishy.
......................................................................................................
I don't need to be a Queen or a King to be a Princess.
...................................................I don't need to be a Queen or a King to be a Princess.
-
knowmad - Posts: 2990
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'12 Barbie Death
Re: your stupid joke here
by theCryptofishist » Sun Nov 11, 2012 10:21 pm
Communist Russia... Joke
A judge walks out of the courtroom, laughing loudly. A colleague asks, "What is it you laugh about?"
"Ah, I just heard an excellent anecdote," the judge says, sweeping tears of laughter.
"An anecdote? Tell me!"
"Are you crazy? I just sentenced a man to ten years for that anecdote."
A judge walks out of the courtroom, laughing loudly. A colleague asks, "What is it you laugh about?"
"Ah, I just heard an excellent anecdote," the judge says, sweeping tears of laughter.
"An anecdote? Tell me!"
"Are you crazy? I just sentenced a man to ten years for that anecdote."
Lose your legs--Become a merit badge.
Remember, you're just a make-believe soldier in an artificial army.
Remember, you're just a make-believe soldier in an artificial army.
-
theCryptofishist - Posts: 34110
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Re: your stupid joke here
by Scatter42 » Sun Nov 11, 2012 11:22 pm
Ha Ha comrade.... is funny
What did the mathematician say when he found his pet parrot missing...?
Polygon!
<sigh>
What did the mathematician say when he found his pet parrot missing...?
Polygon!
<sigh>
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